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P&B Relationship Advice Thread


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I accidently watched a video where two young ladies performed oral sex in each other whilst on their periods, and now I'm gay. Should I pretend to like the next girl who shows interest in me or go after the burly man who's fixing my boiler that doesn't like me?

I'm sorry but this post has had me in an absolute kink for about ten minutes. Do carry on.
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Scratchcards, bitches love scratchcards.

O/T, but Hamilton related: If you bought a scratchcard from your local independent cornershop that you went into most days and won £1m, would you get the shopkeeper a small gift or something?

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O/T, but Hamilton related: If you bought a scratchcard from your local independent cornershop that you went into most days and won £1m, would you get the shopkeeper a small gift or something?

I'd treat them to ten quid scratchcard and let fate take its course.

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I'd treat them to ten quid scratchcard and let fate take its course.

Well you're a better man than the Fairhill womman who won £1m in Ikram's earlier this year and has given the shop a swerve ever since.

I would have got him a Thank You card with a tea bag inside and said "Have a drink on me".

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Well you're a better man than the Fairhill womman who won £1m in Ikram's earlier this year and has given the shop a swerve ever since.

I would have got him a Thank You card with a tea bag inside and said "Have a drink on me".

That reminds me, as well as scratchcards, bitches love tea bags. Teabagging, not so much.

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Well you're a better man than the Fairhill womman who won £1m in Ikram's earlier this year and has given the shop a swerve ever since.

I would have got him a Thank You card with a tea bag inside and said "Have a drink on me".

I would have got him a bottle of vodkat and demanded that the peasant entertained me.

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Bit of a shiter to start going out with a burd near Christmas, one of my best mates is in the same boat! 5 years ago I started seeing a burd that I worked with in November and I spent a good couple of quid on her, I'm talking a TV etc! We started falling away in February and split up in March. Fuckin expensive 3 month relationship that was :lol:.

That's not a relationship. That's a fucking financial transaction :lol:
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I'm disappointed that nobody has suggested anything about a chocolate star fish yet.

Standards are slipping these days.

I thought of a chocolate Spice Rack, are we on the same page?

Grimbo

Eta just G'd " chocolate starfish", you lad are 1 sick individual if that's how you treat your good lady of 6wk standing? Oh btw we are not sharing the same page.

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There's a girl at work I like and the feeling is clearly mutual. However, there's a pretty significant power imbalance and she's also ridiculously religious (although apart from that she's great).

Do I a) go for it and risk making work the most awkward place on the planet, attract the ire of my other colleagues and potentially not get any hole for my troubles until marriage (which is not ok, and I'm really not a scumbag either)

Or b) take the tried and tested 'don't shit where you eat' option, potentially see the mutual attraction grow and become all depressed and resentful because I don't feel I can go for it.

Looking forward to the 'kick her in the pie' response, but genuine advice would be most welcome too!

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Bit of a shiter to start going out with a burd near Christmas, one of my best mates is in the same boat! 5 years ago I started seeing a burd that I worked with in November and I spent a good couple of quid on her, I'm talking a TV etc! We started falling away in February and split up in March. Fuckin expensive 3 month relationship that was :lol:.

Must've got her a Valentine's day gift too then? Ouch.
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There's a girl at work I like and the feeling is clearly mutual. However, there's a pretty significant power imbalance and she's also ridiculously religious (although apart from that she's great).

Do I a) go for it and risk making work the most awkward place on the planet, attract the ire of my other colleagues and potentially not get any hole for my troubles until marriage (which is not ok, and I'm really not a scumbag either)

Or b) take the tried and tested 'don't shit where you eat' option, potentially see the mutual attraction grow and become all depressed and resentful because I don't feel I can go for it.

Looking forward to the 'kick her in the pie' response, but genuine advice would be most welcome too!

Kick her in the pie.

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There's a girl at work I like and the feeling is clearly mutual. However, there's a pretty significant power imbalance and she's also ridiculously religious (although apart from that she's great).

Do I a) go for it and risk making work the most awkward place on the planet, attract the ire of my other colleagues and potentially not get any hole for my troubles until marriage (which is not ok, and I'm really not a scumbag either)

Or b) take the tried and tested 'don't shit where you eat' option, potentially see the mutual attraction grow and become all depressed and resentful because I don't feel I can go for it.

Looking forward to the 'kick her in the pie' response, but genuine advice would be most welcome too!

Get her psihed at xmas party and pump her rotten

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There's a girl at work I like and the feeling is clearly mutual. However, there's a pretty significant power imbalance and she's also ridiculously religious (although apart from that she's great).

Do I a) go for it and risk making work the most awkward place on the planet, attract the ire of my other colleagues and potentially not get any hole for my troubles until marriage (which is not ok, and I'm really not a scumbag either)

Or b) take the tried and tested 'don't shit where you eat' option, potentially see the mutual attraction grow and become all depressed and resentful because I don't feel I can go for it.

Looking forward to the 'kick her in the pie' response, but genuine advice would be most welcome too!

Point out her God is a spaghetti monster and leave sacrilegious pictures of her messiah of choice on her desk.

Once this cures her of religion ask if she would be interested in you eating where she shits.

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Point out her God is a spaghetti monster and leave sacrilegious pictures of her messiah of choice on her desk.

Once this cures her of religion ask if she would be interested in you eating where she shits.

Why would he want to eat a toilet?

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