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Has anyone had any good or bad experience of having to rely on the police?

I had to call them recently and they took ages to arrive. If it's going to take anything more than 10 minutes after being called then they might as well not come.

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Has anyone had any good or bad experience of having to rely on the police?

I had to call them recently and they took ages to arrive. If it's going to take anything more than 10 minutes after being called then they might as well not come.

Three days is the average waiting time, I blame the call centre loonies.

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My police story:

When my grandad died we had to force the door to his house and the police had to come out. One of the policewomen was an absolute 11, she was the spitting image of Yasmine Bleeth from Baywatch (hot Yasmine Bleeth from Baywatch, not strung out cokehead Yasmine Bleeth of later years).

I always find it strange that she is the first thing I think about whenever I think about the day my grandad died.

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My police story:

When my grandad died we had to force the door to his house and the police had to come out. One of the policewomen was an absolute 11, she was the spitting image of Yasmine Bleeth from Baywatch (hot Yasmine Bleeth from Baywatch, not strung out cokehead Yasmine Bleeth of later years).

I always find it strange that she is the first thing I think about whenever I think about the day my grandad died.

Getting a chubby everytime you think about your granda's death is weird. I applaud you.

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My police story:

When my grandad died we had to force the door to his house and the police had to come out. One of the policewomen was an absolute 11, she was the spitting image of Yasmine Bleeth from Baywatch (hot Yasmine Bleeth from Baywatch, not strung out cokehead Yasmine Bleeth of later years).

I always find it strange that she is the first thing I think about whenever I think about the day my grandad died.

Where did she keep her truncheon?

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Getting a chubby everytime you think about your granda's death is weird. I applaud you.

I'm sure if I told that story to my wife, she'd say it was a coping mechanism to stave off thinking about my own mortality.

Or divorce me for being an absolute deviant. One of the two, I'd just need to hope she had her work hat on that day.

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I'm sure if I told that story to my wife, she'd say it was a coping mechanism to stave off thinking about my own mortality.

Or divorce me for being an absolute deviant. One of the two, I'd just need to hope she had her work hat on that day.

When my faither died I was really horny the week of his funeral.

Not horny thinking about him like, he was a nice fella, but not much of a looker.

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When my faither died I was really horny the week of his funeral.

Not horny thinking about him like, he was a nice fella, but not much of a looker.

I think that it's a common reaction to death.

I may just be basing that on Renton shagging his cousin at a wake in Trainspotting though.

edit: it's his dead brother's wife. Not cousin. I think that's better?

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My police story:

When my grandad died we had to force the door to his house and the police had to come out. One of the policewomen was an absolute 11, she was the spitting image of Yasmine Bleeth from Baywatch (hot Yasmine Bleeth from Baywatch, not strung out cokehead Yasmine Bleeth of later years).

I always find it strange that she is the first thing I think about whenever I think about the day my grandad died.

Tangent-ish ...

My daughter is grown-up and healthy but she had a very traumatic birth and there were stages when it was very touch and go and the doctors and nurses were extremely concerned ...

throughout all this though the unbelievably fit midwife kept bending over to do her job and in doing so give me an excellent down-blouse view of her ample and tremendous chebs ... and I'm sure she knew she was doing it!!

Kinda all I can think about when the birth is mentioned.

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1st time I got sent down. I spent the first night in the police cells. The filth that lead me to my cell asked what sentence I got. I told him 14 days for non payment of the poll tax. He said he would have given me 14 years on bread & water. I laughed thinking he was taking the piss, no he wasn't. The funny thing is that when they brought me some food to my cell, I'd already informed him I am a veggy, he gave me a chicken pizza. I told him Ii'm vegetarian he replied vegetarians eat chicken. I wasn't that hungry, he was that thick.

Grimbo

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