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'The Snip'


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Got it done under general about 15 years ago (medical problems on my wife's side). Felt dodgy when I came round but persuaded the doc I was ok and left to drive home. Couple of miles down the road, the pain hit me so bad I threw up. One bollock swelled up to the size of an orange and it felt like I'd been booted in the baws by Jorg Albertz. I've had pain off and on for years so I got a scan three years ago which showed all the tubes and veins had come unravelled - "like a bag o' worms" said the nurse. Turns out the doc had made a mess of the procedure and, because they weren't actually needed now, the testicles were removed and replaced with surgical steel ones. Only problem with that is I have to wear jockstraps to stop them clacking as I walk.

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Thinking about getting it done, the wife had out 2nd 5 weeks ago and decided that's our lot. Spoke to her uncle who has it done said it's pretty straightforward and was confident I could do it no bother. After reading through this though it is actual making me shite my self.

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Got mine done a couple of years ago, I was in and out in 15 mins and it was totally pain-free, just a little disconcerting and uncomfortable with the tugging and burning carry on. Barely even a bruise after it.

I'd booked 3 days off my work to recover so decided to make the most of it - so i staggered, groaning into the car and told the wife it was utter agony, the rest of the week resulted in me lying on the couch watching SkySportsNews, drinking beer and playing online poker. Occasionally groaning in false pain and asking the wife to run out for a chinese, or down the shop for more beer. Even got peace from the bairns as they got told to bolt any time they came near me for fear of jumping on my knackers.

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The wife has been told by her doctor that I need to get the snip if we want to avoid having any more kids. Apparently 'getting off at Haymarket' doesn't medically constitute birth control.

The thought of having this done makes we want to cry. Like really cry. Having someone tugging at my nuts terrifies me. I can't even watch animals getting castrated on the tv without wincing.

Am i making too much of this and need to man up?

Why isn't not getting it done an option?

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I'm getting my tubes done in a month. Too dangerous to have another and I've three which is plenty.

I'll report back from female point of view. We do get a general though lol

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Guy in a band I was in was one of these unfortunate hyper-fertile punters who seemed to get his missus up the stick every time he looked at her funny, and eventually got it done.

Turned up for a rehearsal a few days later wearing trackie bottoms and walking like John Wayne. "How did it go?" we asked. He responded by whapping his baws out - they were about the size and colour of the black in snooker. Horrific. The worst of it was it didn't work - he was still tadpole positive a few months later and had to get something else done.

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