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The Worlds Worst Pubs


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The ionic isn't great, the only time I've been in there was with my old man on a Friday afternoon and the fights were already starting to break out.

The last time I was in flanagans while it still existed, an old man walked in, sat down on a window ledge and spewed everywhere. And then left. About sums that place up to be honest.

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da

The Star Bar in Alloa

Jakeball heaven

That's a coincidence. A mate took me to an Indian restaurant in Alloa on Friday night. I have only once been in Alloa and that was to visit the football park and never went to the town centre. He said Alloa was inbred heaven but it semed ok to me. Didn't go into any pubs though. Curry was ok.

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Copied over from another thread.

Bongo bar - Middlesbrough

There was a pregnant woman eccied out her nut holding a can of red stripe. Her other hand was rocking her pram which contained a young child. This was about 2 in the morning. This pub is located right next the main police station in the centre of town!

Another 2 dodgy pubs I've been to were in Southbank in Middlesbrough.

Barnacles Bills was a pub that sat in a secluded cul de sac on an industrial estate. Being the only customers in the place, me and a couple of mates were playing pool and having a few pints. After a bit of chat with barman, we were asked if we wanted anything. 'Another 3 pints please mate' was the answer. Apparently this isn't what he meant, we were shown into a back room which was an Aladdin's cave of stolen gear, floor to ceiling boxes of nike trainers along with all other sorts. After a quick browse and polite decline, I almost pished myself laughing at his final offer. 'The playboy watches are £20 each, but if you but a his n hers, I'll knock a tenner off'

How could anyone turn down matching playboy watches......

The second place in southbank was a working mans club just on the opposite side of the A66 to the aforementioned barnacle bills. I can't remember the name of it, but we were instantly told to f**k off, by the bald tattooed barman when we walked in the door.

We quickly left the premises.

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I don't mind "shit" pubs. I probably prefer them. It's when I'm in Dalston or the like and nip in somewhere for a pint and it's full of tossers with Poirot moustaches and the seats are made out of newspaper bundles and that wanky shite that disgusts me. As does the £5+ for a pint prices.

See also: the pubs around Southwark where all the "city boys" drink each day after work and feel the need to tell you what they done at work today. I'm not impressed ye made £400,000 in one day on trading the Westeros Peso or some shite Zackary.

But, back into the spirit of things, I worked in Govan and there was a dirty wee Celtic pub round the corner I'd pop in for a pint. Regulars left me to my pint and my paper and it was cheap. VERY rarely the folk I worked with came in as well and one day a wee Estonian lassie joined me and another lad. She got about five whiskys bought for her in half an hour by old smelly guys who came over tae chat her up. To be fair she found it funny and was polite when she declined an offer to dance and the old fellas were gentlemen after the KB.

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There used to be a fairly decent one called The Gate in Kilmarnock which later closed down. It was subsequently reopened as The Cell which is ironically where most of the new regulars belonged. It was a drug fest, wall to wall neds and the toilets were constantly covered in vomit. It's now closed again surprisingly. I used to go from there to Kilmarnock's premier nightspot - Expo - famously once described by the Sunday Mail as the worst club in Scotland.

I'm sure I've been in ones just as bad but can't think just now.

When I was 17 I played a couple of gigs in there in its incarnation as "The Cell" - I remember one night where there were about 30 of us in when I was playing, the place was buzzing. I played another time (last time I played, not long before it shut again) when there was a big ruckus outside and the police locked us in for 3 hours. It was hellish.

Think that place is opening again soon, hopefully they'll manage to get rid of its jakey image.

Worst pub I've been in lately was Denholm's in Glasgow City Centre, which I was dragged to by my pals after a pal's gig at the Buff Club... my word.

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When we were through for the cup final at Celtic Park it was unanimously agreed that based on outside appearance, Turnstiles must be the worst pub in the world. No idea what it's like inside or how the pints are, but I get the impression it's only open for a couple of hours a fortnight when there's a game on. It looks like something from Mad Max.

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I watched someone eat their gastro-esq chips with their hands in Bearsden once. I was truly appalled.

Never been in this pub but I have always been intrigued:

IMGP9329.jpg

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Stellas bar in Romeoville IL

Yes, there is no apostrophe

Went in there once, waiting on prescriptions from the nearby Wallgreen's, it was like stepping back in time to a really manky 70's Scottish pub where "you had to be known" I got away with being in there due to the Scottish accent, chatted up by a female(?) punter with fewer teeth than I've even seen. Had a very swift Miller (best option) then got 3 "scatches" pushed at me (possibly Dewars, but rough as f**k).

Even if I was still drinking I would never go back

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Does anyone remember the hellhole that used to be under Glasgow Central? I went in for a pint before my train one night. It was full of Rangers photos/ photos of the queen etc. Thought I was in for a bit of trouble but just had a vodka and coke and left swiftly. It had plastic chairs and Formica tables. Fully expect some bigot to be on shortly saying how great a pub it was.

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I watched someone eat their gastro-esq chips with their hands in Bearsden once. I was truly appalled.

Never been in this pub but I have always been intrigued:

IMGP9329.jpg

According to my auld man it was like a war zone when open at weekends. The place is slap bang in the middle of duke st, haghill, carntyne , parkhead and shettleson . Haha

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The Alamo In paisley was an experience. Awful pints in one of the pishest attempts at having a themed boozer

Sacrilege

The Alamo is a great wee boozer. Maybe not as fun now they no longer have the cat that used to sleep in the Cheese & Onion Golden Wonder box.

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