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48 minutes ago, Stu said:

 

Sounds like something the Chief out of Scot Squad would say.

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On 03/01/2018 at 00:19, Stu said:

 

That neck will be useful for looking round corners and over walls

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http://www.theboltonnews.co.uk/news/15814512.grandfathers-testicle-explodes-after-contracting-rare-form-of-salmonella-on-tunisian-holiday/?ref=twtrec

A GRANDFATHER whose testicle expanded to the size of a grapefruit after contracting a rare form of salmonella has told of how his life has changed forever.

David Worsley was on holiday in Tunisia with his wife Joanne when he caught African salmonella – a potentially deadly strain of the disease – and had to spend several days in hospital.

After returning to the UK the 59-year-old was so ill he was unable to keep any food down for weeks and lost three stone.

But matters got even worse when he started developing an excruciating pain in his genitals and his testicle started to expand.

He was admitted to hospital but allowed to go home – where his testicle ‘exploded like a volcano’. He then had to have an operation to remove it.

Mr Worsley, who works as a security guard at Bolton Town Hall, said: “I woke up at about 5am with the most excruciating pain in my left testicle. I could barely move and I was in tears from the agony.

“I said to Joanne ‘I’m really unwell’ and she called the doctor who advised I go into hospital immediately.

“I was in for ten days and the pressure continued to grow. It got so big that I needed to carry it around in my hands. It was the size of a grapefruit. I can’t even begin to explain the pain that I was in. and my temperature was off the scale."

He continued to vomit and have diarrhoea but doctors sent home after ten days, advising him antibiotics would bring the swelling down.

But Mr Worsley received more bad news when he returned for an ultrasound scan and was told it had grown even bigger.

"The doctor told me she had never seen anything like it in her 20 year career," he said.

“Despite this I was sent home again. I got in the bath and it just exploded. It literally went bang and that was it.

“When the doctor saw it later she said that it was like a volcano exploding. It was leaking so much that I had to get one of my grandchildren’s nappies and put it around it to stop the flow.

“There was no embarrassment at that point as I just wanted the pain to go away. When it happened I felt like a weight had literally been lifted from me, as I suppose it had. It was almost a relief that it had happened.”

The grandfather-of-two said his life would never be the same after his ordeal.

He said: “This has definitely affected me psychologically and I felt down for a long time. It may sound silly but I didn’t feel complete even though the doctors say you can manage without them.

“In my opinion it’s a big part of being a man that has gone.”

David says that after recovering he went to his nearest branch of Thomson Holidays but was told there was nothing they could do.

He has now launched a civil action against tour operator TUI through Slater and Gordon Lawyers.

He said: “Another effect is that we didn’t go on holiday abroad for three years and when we did I was terrified it was going to happen again.

“It was the holiday from hell and what we have been through was a nightmare. What has happened to me as a result has changed my life.”

Hannah Crosby, a specialist travel lawyer from Slater and Gordon, which represents Mr Worsley, said: “Mr Worsley and his wife were looking forward to their trip to Tunisia for a bit of rest and relaxation but what happened, through no fault of their own, changed their lives.

"David was horrifically sick for months and suffered physical and psychological trauma because of what he was forced to endure. This is without doubt one of the worst holidays from hell I have seen during my time as a travel lawyer.”

Edited by muirkirk nil

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Scots black pudding from Queen’s favoured butcher ‘saved man’s life’ after he got stuck in freezer

https://www.thecourier.co.uk/fp/news/scotland/578051/scots-black-pudding-queens-favoured-butcher-saved-mans-life-got-stuck-freezer/

“The black pudding was the best thing to hit the button with because it was the right shape

Spoiler

Image result for kenneth williams

“It was solid, pointed and I could get plenty of weight behind it. "

Spoiler

Image result for kenneth williams

We only use the finest ingredients for our black pudding and that makes the black pudding harder than elsewhere.

Spoiler

Image result for kenneth williams carry on camping

 

Edited by Melanius Mullarkey

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On 08/01/2018 at 23:44, muirkirk nil said:

http://www.theboltonnews.co.uk/news/15814512.grandfathers-testicle-explodes-after-contracting-rare-form-of-salmonella-on-tunisian-holiday/?ref=twtrec

A GRANDFATHER whose testicle expanded to the size of a grapefruit after contracting a rare form of salmonella has told of how his life has changed forever.

David Worsley was on holiday in Tunisia with his wife Joanne when he caught African salmonella – a potentially deadly strain of the disease – and had to spend several days in hospital.

After returning to the UK the 59-year-old was so ill he was unable to keep any food down for weeks and lost three stone.

But matters got even worse when he started developing an excruciating pain in his genitals and his testicle started to expand.

He was admitted to hospital but allowed to go home – where his testicle ‘exploded like a volcano’. He then had to have an operation to remove it.

Mr Worsley, who works as a security guard at Bolton Town Hall, said: “I woke up at about 5am with the most excruciating pain in my left testicle. I could barely move and I was in tears from the agony.

“I said to Joanne ‘I’m really unwell’ and she called the doctor who advised I go into hospital immediately.

“I was in for ten days and the pressure continued to grow. It got so big that I needed to carry it around in my hands. It was the size of a grapefruit. I can’t even begin to explain the pain that I was in. and my temperature was off the scale."

He continued to vomit and have diarrhoea but doctors sent home after ten days, advising him antibiotics would bring the swelling down.

But Mr Worsley received more bad news when he returned for an ultrasound scan and was told it had grown even bigger.

"The doctor told me she had never seen anything like it in her 20 year career," he said.

“Despite this I was sent home again. I got in the bath and it just exploded. It literally went bang and that was it.

“When the doctor saw it later she said that it was like a volcano exploding. It was leaking so much that I had to get one of my grandchildren’s nappies and put it around it to stop the flow.

“There was no embarrassment at that point as I just wanted the pain to go away. When it happened I felt like a weight had literally been lifted from me, as I suppose it had. It was almost a relief that it had happened.”

The grandfather-of-two said his life would never be the same after his ordeal.

He said: “This has definitely affected me psychologically and I felt down for a long time. It may sound silly but I didn’t feel complete even though the doctors say you can manage without them.

“In my opinion it’s a big part of being a man that has gone.”

David says that after recovering he went to his nearest branch of Thomson Holidays but was told there was nothing they could do.

He has now launched a civil action against tour operator TUI through Slater and Gordon Lawyers.

He said: “Another effect is that we didn’t go on holiday abroad for three years and when we did I was terrified it was going to happen again.

“It was the holiday from hell and what we have been through was a nightmare. What has happened to me as a result has changed my life.”

Hannah Crosby, a specialist travel lawyer from Slater and Gordon, which represents Mr Worsley, said: “Mr Worsley and his wife were looking forward to their trip to Tunisia for a bit of rest and relaxation but what happened, through no fault of their own, changed their lives.

"David was horrifically sick for months and suffered physical and psychological trauma because of what he was forced to endure. This is without doubt one of the worst holidays from hell I have seen during my time as a travel lawyer.”

 

buster_gonad_1.jpg

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