The_Kincardine Posted April 4, 2017 Share Posted April 4, 2017 Stockholm football fans wore niqabs to a match on Sunday: https://www.thelocal.se/20170403/swedish-football-fans-protest-mask-ban-by-wearing-niqabs They should have gone for the whole Life of Brian headgear and false beard IMO: 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted April 5, 2017 Share Posted April 5, 2017 3 hours ago, Melanius Mullarkey said: Cod almighty! http://www.northern-scot.co.uk/News/Woman-escapes-serious-injury-hurt-in-Codfather-chip-van-explosion-05042017.htm You were only supposed to blow the bloody donners off. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JamieStevenson Posted April 7, 2017 Share Posted April 7, 2017 http://www.dunfermlinepress.com/news/15208491.Dunfermline_High_School_teacher_struck_off_for_branding_pupil_a__f___y__and_buying_gig_tickets_during_lesson/?ref=twtrec Big up Mr Cochrane, techy's finest. Once saw him walking home with a shit tonne of wood. Not even bagged or anything, bold as brass. Legend 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eednud Posted April 10, 2017 Share Posted April 10, 2017 Was always told never to go swimming on a full stomach. http://www.goldcoastbulletin.com.au/news/crime-court/police-apprehend-man-after-an-elaborate-chase-on-the-gold-coast/news-story/001dcb686a6e7c82223c6be280e8795d 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stu Posted April 10, 2017 Share Posted April 10, 2017 Australian rapper skips dinner bill by swimming off, court told http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-australia-39552461 He allegedly consumed two lobsters, a baby octopus, 21 vodka oyster shots and "a number of Coronas". "Oh God! By himself?" said magistrate Joan White when she granted bail, according to ABC News. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted April 10, 2017 Share Posted April 10, 2017 39 minutes ago, Melanius Mullarkey said: Man caught wanking in council works van. https://www.eveningtelegraph.co.uk/fp/man-performs-daylight-sex-act-dundee-council-van-yards-childrens-playpark/ This would probably be playing into his hands. However, the council has refused to answer whether there will be a probe. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GordonD Posted April 10, 2017 Share Posted April 10, 2017 1 hour ago, Melanius Mullarkey said: Man caught wanking in council works van. https://www.eveningtelegraph.co.uk/fp/man-performs-daylight-sex-act-dundee-council-van-yards-childrens-playpark/ "there are kids running about. It could have scarred them for life.” Does the guy cum Hydrochloric acid? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SweeperDee Posted April 10, 2017 Share Posted April 10, 2017 Boy wasn't actually wanking apparently. [emoji23] He was have a Celtic sing-song with his wee lad and his girlfriend and he was clapping the wheel and his knee. Apparently. [emoji23] 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted April 10, 2017 Share Posted April 10, 2017 1 minute ago, SweeperDee said: Boy wasn't actually wanking apparently. He was have a Celtic sing-song with his wee lad and his girlfriend and he was clapping the wheel and his knee. Apparently. Sure you were. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SweeperDee Posted April 10, 2017 Share Posted April 10, 2017 Sure you were. I can't drive m9. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GordonD Posted April 10, 2017 Share Posted April 10, 2017 18 minutes ago, SweeperDee said: Boy wasn't actually wanking apparently. He was have a Celtic sing-song That's worse. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted April 10, 2017 Share Posted April 10, 2017 20 minutes ago, SweeperDee said: Boy wasn't actually wanking apparently. He was have a Celtic sing-song with his wee lad and his girlfriend and he was clapping the wheel and his knee. Apparently. You'll Never w**k Alone? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GordonD Posted April 20, 2017 Share Posted April 20, 2017 http://www.alloaadvertiser.com/news/15234909.Sauchie_man_waved_his_willy_around_in_a_busy_barber_shop/ He was drinking Buckfast. Says it all. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stu Posted April 21, 2017 Share Posted April 21, 2017 Local newspaper editor makes the news in a different local newspaper (and sounds like a complete moron): http://www.walesonline.co.uk/news/local-news/herald-newspaper-editor-had-not-12921572 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GordonD Posted April 21, 2017 Share Posted April 21, 2017 3 hours ago, Melanius Mullarkey said: The Wrong Trousers https://www.eveningtelegraph.co.uk/fp/cops-hunt-man-robbed-dundee-flat-wearing-inside-trousers/ Tip for the Dundee polis - he's probably turned them the right way out by now so don't rule out people you see wearing their trousers properly. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted April 21, 2017 Share Posted April 21, 2017 As Loaded mag would've put it, "Good work petrol station fellas.." http://www.walesonline.co.uk/news/wales-news/petrol-station-fuel-mixed-up-12921422 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stu Posted April 21, 2017 Share Posted April 21, 2017 This one may have passed some folk by. The even more amazing thing about this is the original included quotes from the talking cat that the Evening Times reporter has seen and removed yet still thought it was a genuine story. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cosmic Joe Posted April 21, 2017 Share Posted April 21, 2017 Really wish the polis would ditch this "three figure sum" pish. What does it matter if it was £2.56 or £9.22 that the thief trousered? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cosmic Joe Posted April 21, 2017 Share Posted April 21, 2017 Really wish the polis would ditch this "three figure sum" pish. What does it matter if it was £2.56 or £9.22 that the thief trousered? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cosmic Joe Posted April 21, 2017 Share Posted April 21, 2017 Really wish the polis would ditch this "three figure sum" pish. What does it matter if it was £2.56 or £9.22 that the thief trousered? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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