ballymoneyyin Posted June 12, 2013 Share Posted June 12, 2013 I went to cognitive behavioural therapy. My therapist done nothing but try to get me to think delusional and try to claim I was an alcoholic. I am 21 and I drink over the weekends. No matter what spin he put on my biggest situation, eventually something has got to give, (a select few of my dad's side of the family know I exist) so I felt like all I was doing was building myself up to be knocked down when it does eventually come to a head. My Grandparents (who I am in contact with) aren't getting any younger and the time will come when they pass away. I have kept a lid on things for my Dad and their sake. He should probably have came clean about the whole thing to my step sisters years ago, but I appreciate we all make mistakes. What I have learned myself to do is to generally not give much thought for other people and start looking out for number 1. The correct time for me to tell them they have a brother. The ball is in my court and Its up to me do deal with things responsibly. Its not their fault. A time when it wont cause as much upset as it would just now. But I have learned to accept that I may not be able to pay my respects to my Grandparents who stuck by me, and were put in the position to hide their own Grandson, but thats neither on my conscience or their's. Thats the cards I've been dealt with in the lottery of life, so theres no point in being defined by it. I've contacted my dad for the first time last september for 15 years, we have an understanding, I have a good life and there are millions out there in worse positions for me. Luckily although I have a dad who is not much more than an acquaintance, I have a wonderful Mother, and step dad. What I do is set myself up with the worst and think about how bad it really is. Once I see its not as bad as first thought, strategise every possible outcome, ensuring I come out the other end with people knowing I dealt with it in a respectful, calm and dignified manner. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fafc1885 Posted June 12, 2013 Share Posted June 12, 2013 (edited) I promise you if you don't meet her tomorrow she'll most likely never want to meet you again. Just do it. #bealpha I went to go meet her and despite her saying she was there, she no showed, and ignored my attempt to get in touch with her, which isn't a very decent thing to do. On the other hand, I actually feel good despite that, I made an effort to meet a girl for the first time in two years almost. Edited June 12, 2013 by fafc1885 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bert Raccoon Posted June 12, 2013 Share Posted June 12, 2013 I went to go meet her and despite her saying she was there, she no showed, and ignored my attempt to get in touch with her, which isn't a very dece thing to do. On the other hand, I actually feel good despite that, I made an effort to meet a girl for the first time in two years almost. You should feel good and it's good you're looking at the positives in the situation. Stay positive and you'll meet someone decent, sorry dece in no time at all. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fafc1885 Posted June 12, 2013 Share Posted June 12, 2013 Cheers, I hope so! Normally I'd be negative about everything to do with me so it's a step in the right direction. I'm ashamed of myself for using that word, first and only time I'll use it 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mattydfc Posted June 13, 2013 Share Posted June 13, 2013 I went to go meet her and despite her saying she was there, she no showed, and ignored my attempt to get in touch with her, which isn't a very decent thing to do. On the other hand, I actually feel good despite that, I made an effort to meet a girl for the first time in two years almost. Congrats brah. Don't let that stop you from meeting them in the future either. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jamamafegan Posted June 13, 2013 Share Posted June 13, 2013 I went to go meet her and despite her saying she was there, she no showed, and ignored my attempt to get in touch with her, which isn't a very decent thing to do. On the other hand, I actually feel good despite that, I made an effort to meet a girl for the first time in two years almost. Yeah that's shite patter from her, but as the others said - good man for doing it and keep at it. I'm only 20 myself and went on my first ever date a few months ago. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raidernation Posted June 13, 2013 Share Posted June 13, 2013 I now face the same challenge I did in 2009. My wife died early this morning, very suddenly, and I will need to watch out for the signs and hope I spot them before I go downhill 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KeeperDee Posted June 13, 2013 Share Posted June 13, 2013 I now face the same challenge I did in 2009. My wife died early this morning, very suddenly, and I will need to watch out for the signs and hope I spot them before I go downhill Condolences. Sent from my GT-I9505 using Pie & Bovril mobile app 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aufc Posted June 13, 2013 Share Posted June 13, 2013 This convo is a bit surreal 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
harkinsbaldpatch Posted June 13, 2013 Share Posted June 13, 2013 I now face the same challenge I did in 2009. My wife died early this morning, very suddenly, and I will need to watch out for the signs and hope I spot them before I go downhill Cant imagine what your going through, so sorry to hear that, plenty of people here if you need a chat 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paranoid android Posted June 13, 2013 Author Share Posted June 13, 2013 I now face the same challenge I did in 2009. My wife died early this morning, very suddenly, and I will need to watch out for the signs and hope I spot them before I go downhill Very sorry to hear that, mate. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raidernation Posted June 13, 2013 Share Posted June 13, 2013 I am very lucky. I have 3 brilliant step daughters, a great family here, friends and colleagues and lots of other folk looking after me. (and vice versa). Never ceases to amaze me how kind people are, and I really haven't got a clue why I deserve all this kindness. Thank you one and all on here for your support too. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paranoid android Posted June 13, 2013 Author Share Posted June 13, 2013 I am very lucky. I have 3 brilliant step daughters, a great family here, friends and colleagues and lots of other folk looking after me. (and vice versa). Never ceases to amaze me how kind people are, and I really haven't got a clue why I deserve all this kindness. Thank you one and all on here for your support too. My family are amazing people - sounds like yours are too - stick in, bud. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JamboMikey Posted June 15, 2013 Share Posted June 15, 2013 (edited) Anyone had any experience of taking Venlafaxine before? Got prescribed it yesterday as I've been taken fluoxetine for ages without it doing anything. Spent most of the night having mental dreams and then waking up hallucinating about people being in my room. Hoping the side effects are just an initial reaction. Edited June 15, 2013 by JamboMikey 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RandomGuy. Posted June 15, 2013 Share Posted June 15, 2013 Anyone had any experience of taking Venlafaxine before? Got prescribed it yesterday as I've been taken fluoxetine for ages without it doing anything. Spent most of the night having mental dreams and then waking up hallucinating about people being in my room. Hoping the side effects are just an initial reaction. There was probably just people in your room. Nothing to worry about 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paranoid android Posted June 15, 2013 Author Share Posted June 15, 2013 Anyone had any experience of taking Venlafaxine before? Got prescribed it yesterday as I've been taken fluoxetine for ages without it doing anything. Spent most of the night having mental dreams and then waking up hallucinating about people being in my room. Hoping the side effects are just an initial reaction. It's maybe just an initial reaction/side effect that will ease off as your body gets used to the drug. It's also possible that Venlafaxine isn't the right drug for you. If you read the notes that (should) come with the tablets, there should be a section giving advice/info on possible side effects - there should also be instructions on how to deal with side effects or a bad reaction - I think there should also be a number to call, so that you can ask questions. You could maybe call your doctor on Monday morning, or maybe your local surgery have an emergency number at weekends - failing that, maybe the NHS 24 hour helpline can advise you if you feel that you're not able to wait? It's early days with the drug, so the side-effects might wear off - monitor your behaviour, and make sure to ask for advice from qualified experts. Hope it works out, pal - be good to hear how you get on? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
harkinsbaldpatch Posted June 16, 2013 Share Posted June 16, 2013 Have a chance of a move away from living below the neighbours from hell but the house we looked at for swap is abit smaller than our flat. I am all for it but wife is humming and hawing, she knows how i feel about the current situation we are in and id move in a minute as you can always work round things. Trying not to build my hopes up but most family members are putting a downer on the move. Im worried that when my neighbours come back i will slump back into my old routine and feel this is the perfect chance for a new start 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dorlomin Posted June 16, 2013 Share Posted June 16, 2013 Anyone had any experience of taking Venlafaxine before? I have a very close friend who is on it. FWIW she is a PHd in psychology so has a wee bit of knowledge of the area. Bad for constipation but ok for mid level depression. Best give any drug a couple of weeks to bed in. Hoping the side effects are just an initial reaction. Dreams and remembering them are not really about your mental state, just when you are waking up in your sleep cycle. If you are waking up when you are in the shallow phase you are much more likely to remember them than waking up in the deep phase. Stick with it but make a note of when and where you notice things then bring it up with your GP when you next meet. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JamboMikey Posted June 16, 2013 Share Posted June 16, 2013 Yeah, thanks man. I'm sure it'll ease off eventually. Been feeling a bit ill and getting the sweats but apparently that's quite normal. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Swampy Posted June 16, 2013 Share Posted June 16, 2013 Sorry to hear about your loss, raidernation. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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