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Out of the mouth of babes...


kiwififer

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3 minutes ago, Todd_is_God said:

Pointed out to the wife that there is a documentary on tonight about Third Lanark, and that she might be interested in it as we went to their ground recently.

"That the one in Berlin?" Comes the reply.

No, That's Third Reich she's thinking of

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Not a babe but a lassy all the same...
“We went to ikea at the weekend but I didn’t really understand the concept of it so we didn’t know there was a downstairs”
Wtf? That’s stairs you’re struggling with the concept of, no ikea.

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  • 2 weeks later...
  • 1 month later...

Recently rewatched A Game of Thrones.

 

Her “it must have been shit living back then”

Me “back when”

Her “you know, in the olden times”

Me “what????”

Her “you know, like back then”

Me “you do realise game of thrones isn’t based on medieval time ?”

Her “yeah obviously, dragons died with the rest of the dinosaurs”

 

 

She’s actually employed as a university tutor.

 

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  • 3 weeks later...

i was roasting chicken breasts last night and asked her to go through and take them out. she came back through.

her "theyre not ready yet"
me "why not theyve been in long enough"
her "no theyre white"
me laughing "what colour do you think they should b3"
her "i dont know - kinnda brown"

shes 36!

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Playing a board game last night and she had to finish this advertising slogan, "I can't believe its not........"

After 10 minutes of, " what's the name of that butter, is it Flora or what's that other butter called.......... "

I actually can't breathe for laughing.

She plumps for "I can't believe its not Utterly Butterly", therefore including the right word and another companies advertising slogan.

My lungs hurt today from laughing.

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On 26/09/2018 at 16:06, Shandon Par said:

“I gave some money to a homeless person the other day. He had such a sad sign about his life”

So far so good. She is a good hearted girl.

”I gave him £50”

Think I spat tea out my nose and eyeballs.

If my wife done that she would be sitting next to him the  next day...

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