Sergeant Wilson Posted December 9, 2017 Share Posted December 9, 2017 3 minutes ago, Sweet Pete said: I'm not even convinced of what these tests can accurately tell a prospective employer. For example: you take the test and it says you are not the easiest to get along with, but all the other candidates who are more compliant are less skilled / qualified for the role, so what point was there in the test? Or like your experience, the tests suggest to the person reading the results that none of the applicants are suited, so you just don't hire anyone to fill the vacant role? Pointless nonsense. It was with Banks Mining. Going around the country convincing gullible village idiots to have their environment destroyed by open cast mining, then leaving them a shitey swing park when they fill it in. Right up my street. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
throbber Posted December 9, 2017 Share Posted December 9, 2017 Couldn’t agree more Pete. You need to ask yourself if that’s the sort of company you want to be working for if that’s the sort of pish they are asking you during the interview process. The sort of people I would want to work for would want to meet face to face and have a chat about work. No nonsense. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Granny Danger Posted December 9, 2017 Share Posted December 9, 2017 Don’t knock psychometric testing. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Central Posted December 9, 2017 Share Posted December 9, 2017 It's a tech company so they do have a very modern and different outlook on things like interviewing. It's too good an opportunity to turn down or I would have told them to get fucked. Had to buy a webcam and all sorts! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gordon EF Posted December 9, 2017 Share Posted December 9, 2017 I had an interview for an analyst job with Tesco a few years back. 6 of us were there and they gave us a surprise IQ test before the interviews. After the test, they told 3 boys to just go away, including one who flew in from Milan for the interview. Why not do the fucking tests online? c***s. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
throbber Posted December 9, 2017 Share Posted December 9, 2017 I had an interview for an analyst job with Tesco a few years back. 6 of us were there and they gave us a surprise IQ test before the interviews. After the test, they told 3 boys to just go away, including one who flew in from Milan for the interview. Why not do the fucking tests online? c***s. What was your IQ Gordon?It’s a joke they did that, companies have no consideration for how you get to the interview. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gordon EF Posted December 9, 2017 Share Posted December 9, 2017 What was your IQ Gordon?It’s a joke they did that, companies have no consideration for how you get to the interview. They never said. They told me I scored the highest but still didn't give me the job. The interview questions seemed weirdly focussed on what I would do if I encountered work place bullying. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
throbber Posted December 9, 2017 Share Posted December 9, 2017 They never said. They told me I scored the highest but still didn't give me the job. The interview questions seemed weirdly focussed on what I would do if I encountered work place bullying. Maybe “join in” wasn’t the answer they were looking for! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gordon EF Posted December 9, 2017 Share Posted December 9, 2017 Obviously "join in" wasn't the answer they were looking for. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
throbber Posted December 9, 2017 Share Posted December 9, 2017 Obviously "join in" wasn't the answer they were looking for. I was just being jovial. The final interview question I got asked at the end of that gruelling day at the assessment centre I mentioned earlier was “how would you show empathy towards a coworker who was having personal problems and struggling to cope with their workload!” What the f**k am I supposed to say to that exactly? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gordon EF Posted December 9, 2017 Share Posted December 9, 2017 I was just being jovial. The final interview question I got asked at the end of that gruelling day at the assessment centre I mentioned earlier was “how would you show empathy towards a coworker who was having personal problems and struggling to cope with their workload!” What the f**k am I supposed to say to that exactly? Ha. Genuinely didn't see your reply before I posted that. Great minds...f**k knows what they're looking for with these stupid questions. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
throbber Posted December 9, 2017 Share Posted December 9, 2017 Ha. Genuinely didn't see your reply before I posted that. Great minds...f**k knows what they're looking for with these stupid questions. Haha that is quite an outstanding coincidence! Neither do I, I actually wasn’t sure exactly what empathy was and I just spouted general pish about helping them out with their workload etc. I have decided I’m best suited to a small company and I am never going through with any nonsense like that again. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drew Brees Posted December 9, 2017 Share Posted December 9, 2017 Had a night out at a clash tribute band last night, can’t really remember much but thankfully nothing other than a sore head to report this morning, then I got this 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Honest_Man#1 Posted December 9, 2017 Share Posted December 9, 2017 On the job interviews, graduate schemes have to be the worst for this. The initial tests and questions you've to answer takes hours for each one. The application process for them is farcically long, it's ridiculous that the interview process for a graduate is more drawn out than it would be for the fucking MD. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eddiemunster Posted December 9, 2017 Share Posted December 9, 2017 I've been using pakora farts as a disciplinary tool against the weans today. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drew Brees Posted December 9, 2017 Share Posted December 9, 2017 Must be about time for a picture of a bestockinged lady sitting on Doug Rougvie whilst apparently trying to cop a feel of Gordon's Strachan's balls. Spoiler Bang on time. I was just saying to the missus “when’s that fucking picture of a bestockinged lady sitting on Doug Rougvie whilst apparently trying to cop a feel of Gordon's Strachan's balls coming onto p&b?” and boom here it is, thank you for being efficient. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted December 9, 2017 Share Posted December 9, 2017 Is it too much to hope for a plunge in temperature tonight? https://www.sleepinthepark.co.uk/ 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Naitch Posted December 9, 2017 Share Posted December 9, 2017 I’m doing the Glasgow Santa Dash tomorrow and have done f**k all training. Just as well there’s a pub at the finish line to help me recover. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DA Baracus Posted December 9, 2017 Share Posted December 9, 2017 Re application processes; for a job stacking shelves in Asda I had to pass a 3 stage interview. The first was the online application, which I had actually tried about 4 or 5 times before a couple of years previously with no luck. Despite giving almost exactly the same answers (I used to have a Word document where I had typed up answers to the usual common 'describe a time when..' questions that I often used, usually successfully) I passed. The second stage was a group thing where we had to do stupid shit like build a tower with straws and pitch a product we've invented. Quite what the f**k this had to do with stacking shelves I had no idea. I suppose they thought it was something to do with teamwork, but when you're stacking shelves there isn't actually much teamwork involved. You just take a cage of whatever to where you're told then stack the products. We also had to complete an insulting easy task where we had to go to certain aisles and write down certain products. The third stage was a one on one interview, where they asked shit like what drew me to the job and where I saw myself in a few years. Remember this was for a shelf stacking job. I got the job. Lasted 1 day then jacked it cos I had to get up mental early and just couldn't be arsed with it. Applied for a job at Spar not long after. After filling out the online application the manager called me in to the shop for a short chat, which was informal and was just to see if I was a bam. When he saw I wasn't I got the job. Ended up jacking it after a few months because the new manager was a dick. He called up Scotrail once because I missed a shift due to a hangover and said I had been away and the train was cancelled due to snow. If I'd been fired for that I couldn't really complain, but I just quit instead because the guy was an utter jobsworth widely detested by everyone. Got 2 jobs shortly after (both online applications then interview, both with the same company). 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cerberus Posted December 10, 2017 Share Posted December 10, 2017 5 hours ago, DA Baracus said: Re application processes; for a job stacking shelves in Asda I had to pass a 3 stage interview. The first was the online application, which I had actually tried about 4 or 5 times before a couple of years previously with no luck. Despite giving almost exactly the same answers (I used to have a Word document where I had typed up answers to the usual common 'describe a time when..' questions that I often used, usually successfully) I passed. The second stage was a group thing where we had to do stupid shit like build a tower with straws and pitch a product we've invented. Quite what the f**k this had to do with stacking shelves I had no idea. I suppose they thought it was something to do with teamwork, but when you're stacking shelves there isn't actually much teamwork involved. You just take a cage of whatever to where you're told then stack the products. We also had to complete an insulting easy task where we had to go to certain aisles and write down certain products. The third stage was a one on one interview, where they asked shit like what drew me to the job and where I saw myself in a few years. Remember this was for a shelf stacking job. I got the job. Lasted 1 day then jacked it cos I had to get up mental early and just couldn't be arsed with it. Applied for a job at Spar not long after. After filling out the online application the manager called me in to the shop for a short chat, which was informal and was just to see if I was a bam. When he saw I wasn't I got the job. Ended up jacking it after a few months because the new manager was a dick. He called up Scotrail once because I missed a shift due to a hangover and said I had been away and the train was cancelled due to snow. If I'd been fired for that I couldn't really complain, but I just quit instead because the guy was an utter jobsworth widely detested by everyone. Got 2 jobs shortly after (both online applications then interview, both with the same company). 2 jobs in the same company at the same time? Sounds tiring. I have a hard time getting motivated to do 1 job. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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