Gnash Posted February 24, 2018 Share Posted February 24, 2018 I was changing my 18 month old's nappy this morning and suddenly felt a warm moist feeling on my face and body (I was topless). In the next 2 seconds or so I tried to decipher this unexpected situation, before my conscious mind realised the only rational explanation was that my beloved son had projectile shat on me. After spending some considerable time cleaning myself and the carpet, I looked at the lad in quiet wonder that he managed to aim at, and successfully hit, my face with his faeces at a distance of about 2 feet and an upwards angle of about 45 degrees. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pandarilla Posted February 25, 2018 Share Posted February 25, 2018 My friend got it done and I didn't realise you can still spunk stuff up. I thought it would be like a dry retch.I don't even like feeling/checking my own nuts so feck letting anyone else go at them with a knife.Maybe just slam a couple of housebricks together when the time comesA dry retch? Seriously?That's akin to girls who thought they could get pregnant from a blow job. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bairnardo Posted February 25, 2018 Share Posted February 25, 2018 Every haircut I get could be my last, as I hurtle towards baldness, meanwhile, my two year old is sporting this.... Mental. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post ICTChris Posted February 26, 2018 Popular Post Share Posted February 26, 2018 My son Callan was born today at 04:15 after several days of stress and worry following an induction. Genuinely overwhelmed this morning phoning people to tell them about him. 40 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
throbber Posted February 26, 2018 Share Posted February 26, 2018 Great news Chris, I'm out of greenies today! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RH33 Posted February 26, 2018 Share Posted February 26, 2018 Many congratulations! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adam Posted February 26, 2018 Share Posted February 26, 2018 Congratulations Chris, great news! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted February 26, 2018 Share Posted February 26, 2018 17 minutes ago, ICTChris said: My son Callan was born today at 04:15 after several days of stress and worry following an induction. Genuinely overwhelmed this morning phoning people to tell them about him. Congrats! You're at the start of a very interesting, worthwhile journey. Look forward to your next decent kip in about 2025. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bairnardo Posted February 26, 2018 Share Posted February 26, 2018 My son Callan was born today at 04:15 after several days of stress and worry following an induction. Genuinely overwhelmed this morning phoning people to tell them about him. Well done. All thr best and dont underestimate the usefulness of this thread and (most of) the people in it! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted February 26, 2018 Share Posted February 26, 2018 2 minutes ago, Bairnardo said: 22 minutes ago, ICTChris said: My son Callan was born today at 04:15 after several days of stress and worry following an induction. Genuinely overwhelmed this morning phoning people to tell them about him. Well done. All thr best and dont underestimate the usefulness of this thread and (most of) the people in it! He should maybe have kept quiet about it with throbber aka The Childsnatcher on the lookout for a newborn to swipe and pass off as his own. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
heedthebaa Posted February 26, 2018 Share Posted February 26, 2018 37 minutes ago, ICTChris said: My son Callan was born today at 04:15 after several days of stress and worry following an induction. Genuinely overwhelmed this morning phoning people to tell them about him. Congratulations Chris 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rugster Posted February 26, 2018 Share Posted February 26, 2018 54 minutes ago, ICTChris said: My son Callan was born today at 04:15 after several days of stress and worry following an induction. Genuinely overwhelmed this morning phoning people to tell them about him. Congratulations Chris, fantastic news. Hope all are well. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jacksgranda Posted February 26, 2018 Share Posted February 26, 2018 2 hours ago, ICTChris said: My son Callan was born today at 04:15 after several days of stress and worry following an induction. Genuinely overwhelmed this morning phoning people to tell them about him. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Puppets Posted February 26, 2018 Share Posted February 26, 2018 4 hours ago, ICTChris said: My son Callan was born today at 04:15 after several days of stress and worry following an induction. Genuinely overwhelmed this morning phoning people to tell them about him. Excellent name. Congratulations. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post ICTChris Posted February 28, 2018 Popular Post Share Posted February 28, 2018 I have no memory of posting that, it was a helluva few days.The absolute boyYer auld da 20 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raidernation Posted March 1, 2018 Share Posted March 1, 2018 Has throbber’s possibly fictional wife popped the fictional sprig yet? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pleslie99 Posted March 1, 2018 Share Posted March 1, 2018 It's currently 230am and I'm up with the wee one. She got her 8 week jags yesterday so is a bit out of sorts. Just threw her bottle up and now won't settle. Wee shame u just feel so helpless when they're not themselves. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sjc Posted March 1, 2018 Share Posted March 1, 2018 On 2/27/2018 at 00:23, ICTChris said: My son Callan was born today at 04:15 after several days of stress and worry following an induction. Genuinely overwhelmed this morning phoning people to tell them about him. Nice one! Congratulations to you and your Missus 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post throbber Posted March 1, 2018 Popular Post Share Posted March 1, 2018 Had my daughter at 1400 yesterday weighing in at 8 pounds 10, my Mrs had to get surgery after as she lost a lot of blood so it wasn’t the easiest experience but all is good now and I can safely say I am the happiest man in north Edinburgh.(Below picture is actually my child and is in no way imaginary) 33 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melanius Mullarkey Posted March 1, 2018 Share Posted March 1, 2018 1 minute ago, throbber said: Had my daughter at 1400 yesterday weighing in at 8 pounds 10, my Mrs had to get surgery after as she lost a lot of blood so it wasn’t the easiest experience but all is good now and I can safely say I am the happiest man in north Edinburgh. (Below picture is actually my child and is in no way imaginary) Congratulations throbber. She looks a wee cracker. Pass on all our regards to Mrs throbber also. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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