Pregnancy And Parenting

[Finch road]

Wanking outdoors [emoji23] [emoji23] wtf

[19QOS19]

Wanking outdoors [emoji23] [emoji23] wtf

This. Word for word, this!

[Jacksgranda]

10 hours ago, BigFatTabbyDave said:

Good to know that there are fresh horrors that potentially await. I might just try chemical castration.

Yes, but what about your son?

[throbber]

I would be mortified if my dad had given me a chat about wanking, would literally have been the most torturous thing imaginable.

[Alert Mongoose]

Was a huge change for us the tongie tie. Fed better and made both us and him a lot happier.
Procedure is straight forward. Now he is 5 and all is good.

Did you give blinkers a shot as well?

[davied85]

8lb mate

We're doing same getting it done privately next week . Wee question , was the wee lass a heavy baby?

[taurus]

8lb mate

We're doing same getting it done privately next week . Wee question , was the wee lass a heavy baby?

I just thought it more prevalent in heavy babies . He was 10 lb 11 oc

[BFTD]

3 hours ago, throbber said:

I would be mortified if my dad had given me a chat about wanking, would literally have been the most torturous thing imaginable.

I vaguely remember some comedian saying that, when he started wanking, he was too lazy to chuck the tissues in the bin, so his bedroom floor was covered in them. His mum would pick them up every now and then  

She must have mentioned it to his old man, as one night when they were leaving for a night out, his dad said, "make sure and pick up all those tissues before we get back". He tried to bluff it out by saying that he'd had a really bad cold, but his dad gave him a knowing look and said, "we both know that isn't snot in those tissues".

Tissues in the bin every time from then on  

[8MileBU]

We live next door to two elderly ladies (80's). Earlier this year my I caught my 12 year old son wanking in our back garden. I've tried to explain just how he might have killed them, but he really  doesnt care.

[emoji23]

[throbber]

I vaguely remember some comedian saying that, when he started wanking, he was too lazy to chuck the tissues in the bin, so his bedroom floor was covered in them. His mum would pick them up every now and then  
She must have mentioned it to his old man, as one night when they were leaving for a night out, his dad said, "make sure and pick up all those tissues before we get back". He tried to bluff it out by saying that he'd had a really bad cold, but his dad gave him a knowing look and said, "we both know that isn't snot in those tissues".
Tissues in the bin every time from then on  [emoji14]

Its madness but it must be so obvious to the parents what's going on but f**k knows how you could go about approaching the subject without it being unimaginably awkward!

We had 20 week scan last week and it was all good and everything in proportion etc. Managed to resist finding out the sex as well. All starting to feel real now.

[Sergeant Wilson]

On 29/9/2017 at 00:08, Tony Ferrino said:

We live next door to two elderly ladies (80's). Earlier this year my I caught my 12 year old son wanking in our back garden. I've tried to explain just how he might have killed them, but he really  doesnt care.

I think we'll hear a lot more about this boy. Let's hope he's caught before he's killed too many.

[19QOS19]

Its madness but it must be so obvious to the parents what's going on but f**k knows how you could go about approaching the subject without it being unimaginably awkward!

We had 20 week scan last week and it was all good and everything in proportion etc. Managed to resist finding out the sex as well. All starting to feel real now.

It's a boy I'm telling you!


(I am making this prediction purely down to the fact you mentioned your Mrs had quite bad morning sickness. One of my sister in law's had it bad each time and she has three boys. My Mrs and her other sister were sick once and had girls.)

So aye. A full proof system. Get the boys names picked Throbbs.

[throbber]

It's a boy I'm telling you!


(I am making this prediction purely down to the fact you mentioned your Mrs had quite bad morning sickness. One of my sister in law's had it bad each time and she has three boys. My Mrs and her other sister were sick once and had girls.)

So aye. A full proof system. Get the boys names picked Throbbs.

I think it's a boy too despite thinking it was a girl at the start, not sure what I would prefer to have tbh. Have a girls name sorted but not sure about a boys name but very exciting all the same and a good feeling knowing that it's in good health at this stage.

[steelmen]

It's a boy I'm telling you!


(I am making this prediction purely down to the fact you mentioned your Mrs had quite bad morning sickness. One of my sister in law's had it bad each time and she has three boys. My Mrs and her other sister were sick once and had girls.)

So aye. A full proof system. Get the boys names picked Throbbs.

My wife was sick for the 8 out of the 9 months... and it was a girl. Granted it might have been some of the shite she was eating that made her sick... make me nearly throw up making it.

[Tony Ferrino]

On 29/09/2017 at 09:28, pandarilla said:

 

Wait, what?

You caught your son wanking? And this wasn't the most excruciating moment of his life so far?

And what the f**k was he doing wanking outside ?

 

Me and his mum decided at an early age that we'd bring our kids up as outdoorsy types. 

[welshbairn]

Just now, Tony Ferrino said:

Me and his mum decided at an early age that we'd bring our kids up as outdoorsy types. 

Maybe taking them along to dogging parties was ill advised.

[Tony Ferrino]

15 minutes ago, welshbairn said:

Maybe taking them along to dogging parties was ill advised.

Hindsight is a wonderful thing.

[welshbairn]

I was caught by my mum and dad wanking off to Barbarella on the telly when they came back unexpectedly early from a night out. Thankfully we're an emotionally constrained family so nothing was said.

[The_Kincardine]

23 hours ago, throbber said:

 

Its madness but it must be so obvious to the parents what's going on but f**k knows how you could go about approaching the subject without it being unimaginably awkward!

 

Hope Throbberta is in good health.

Discussing wanking is only awkward if you leave it until you start washing crusty PJs/sheets/boxers by which time it's too late. 

There's a continuum from telling your son not to fiddle with his cock in public when he's wee through telling him to go to his room then explaining why he should use tissues and then a discussion about condoms and being sexually responsible.  Nothing awkward about it at all.

[Tony Ferrino]

44 minutes ago, welshbairn said:

I was caught by my mum and dad wanking off to Barbarella on the telly when they came back unexpectedly early from a night out. Thankfully we're an emotionally constrained family so nothing was said.

Sometimes the best response is to make a cup of tea.