Branch Ton

Bless, our very own Huge McIlfanny wannabe sports journalist of the year,

What about your A in English?

Kindly explain why you think each of the various parts of the post is dogshite chump. Be very precise., none of your usual battyshit turgid prose please..

Whilst the shitfest continues our new chairman is busying away creating a challenging but achievable strategy vision. He states that we currently have talented and hard working staff across all departments. Hopefully his nickname isn’t Nero. Our offer should be competitive and attractive football. Instead we seem to have a budget aimed solely to try to finish above the bottom two using hoof ball and rotational fouling. We have a paper thin small squad with insufficient defenders, an unbalanced midfield lacking in pace and creativity and SFA in the way of emerging prospects. It’s a disgrace that we cannot come close to having a complete bench. If we cannot compete with the likes of Arbroath against whom our record is appalling wtf is the point of going through this angst year after year. Of course Dougie’s splash the cash approach isn’t the answer either but neither is a zero risk one. The size and quality of the current squad renders us uncompetitive in this league and certainly not what we need in the seaside league. Better to bite the bullet now and have the Dad’s Army guys depart by mutual agreement and bring in some younger part-timers until the vision is complete.

Develop what and into what exactly? He has already delegated the development of King and been allowed to sign his aging cronies, in the full knowledge of their inherent limitations, but presumably on the basis they will fit with his one dimensional playing style. You can often tell the cut of a man by the trousers he wears.

Just for once could the sycophantic tosser who interviews Imrie respond to “it’s down to individual errors” by asking Imrie to admit to some of his own. And maybe also why he doesn’t consider a playing comeback given that the ever present Broadfoot is only one year older than him.

I bet your sad little red dotting heart needs that more than I do.

Hopefully your astonishment will subside when you understand the difference between intellect and intelligence.

Ooft. You have neither the intellect nor physical presence to back up this sort of stuff. Pipedown you arrogant little p***k.

Well he is clearly not the brightest bulb in the box if he didn’t understand the anti betting rules.

Imrie is guilty of cronyism and ageism. Someone needs to vet his recruitment policy and oversee the development of younger players. If the likes of Joe Jordan, Joe Harper, Neil McNab we’re here now they too would be shunted out on loan never to return. Whoever decided to sanction Imrie’s recruitment of Broadfoot , out of obscurity, and Power is should be kicked up the arse. It’s utter bollocks that we can’t give younger players like McGrattan a regular place,

Back to back shaming home defeats. Not to worry though Dougie probably has another couple of over the hill mates in the pipeline who need something to fill in between their next tattoos.

What fresh form of hell is this dog’s bollocks of a team. . Sooner Imrie, who is nowhere are good as he thinks he is, is off to Dundee Utd with his most of his useless former acquaintances the better. So Strapp is not in his plans but he brings in Miller and Crawford. Says it all.

What a surprise, Imrie’s toadie gives you a red dot without deigning to otherwise defend Imrie’s’ clusterf**k of a squad assembly. We are doomed to a future of watching journeymen centre backs and holding midfielders running about a bit pretending to press but playing aimless cross field passes and/or hoof ball as there is no outlet. Sod trying to find and develop creative players. Wouldn’t be surprised if KIng isn’t loaned to Greenock Juniors if he has a dip in form.

Of course he ain’t going to fix it. Anyone who thinks two home defeats in a row is a “one off”, gets tactically outwitted by Dick Campbell yet again, can’t coax performances out of the club’s most valuable assets in Lyon and Strapp and favours cronies to ability is probably better off running the Tory Party than managing Morton.