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Arsehole

I'm looking forward to next weeks P&B themed installment Here's a sample quiz for them to base theirs on: 1. What does P&B stand for? A. Pie and Beans B. Pie and Bovril C. Poles and Bulgarians D. Peanut and Butter 2. Complete the following statement in dealing with a disobedient female - Kick her in the ___ ? A. Pie B. Flan C. Tart D. Sponge 3. Someone that displays shocking habits or behaviour is one for the what? A. Listening B. Touching C. Watching D. Smelling 4. What part of the anatomy will often remove itself? A. Head B. Shoulder C. Knee D. Toe 5. Pics or ? A. GTF B. GTG C. GTH D. GTI 6. What is it? A. Eggy Bread B. French Toast C. Eggy Dip Dip D. Frenchy Dip Dip Toast 7. Who's the boss A. Dave B. Div C. Dean D. Dove 8. What does BRALT stand for? A. Being Rangers And Lying Tenaciously B. Buying Rangers And Losing Terribly C. Big Rangers Administration/Liquidation Thread D. Big Rangers Arse Like Twats 9. What age does a woman have to be to qualify for MILF status (regardless of having children)? A. 30 B. 35 C. 40 D. 45 10. If someone is getting extremely agitated at the most minuscule of things, what might they be? A. Soaking B. Steaming C. Seething D. Screaming _____________________________________________________________ Much better than asking about cricketers IMO

So we went 13 games or whatever it was without a league win and the manager offers his resignation (no talk whatsoever about being sacked), we "reluctantly accept" and the board then deem what can get us out this rut by recruiting within the dressing room. Two players who are part of the playing squad who have embarrassed us this season from start to finish. With f**k all managerial experience. Why? Cowdenbeath have taken on Gary Locke purely to go in there and fire a rocket up the players arses and remind everyone (including himself by the way) this is the last chance saloon. Why do we have two people who are part of a decimated dressing room made responsible? One of which is our sole goalscorer who doesn't have enough on his plate. The usual reply will be why I don't step up and do something about this because we're a CIC and all this shite. The CIC was a money making exorcise, nothing else. Its been proved it doesn't work. We are a fucking shambles and we lose next Saturday at Cowdenbeath we are in danger of going out of business.

A desultory 5/10. I did, though, send an email to The Austrailian as I thought they should know about us. I'll keep you posted if I get a reply:

I know this is nothing to do with anything discussed in the last few posts but can I just take a moment to say, Dundee United. Are. Shite. Thank you.

Not so funny the second time. You arsehole.

My folks are huge Nats. My Dad occasionally shouts about the "fucking Tory b*****ds". Only when I'm reading other peoples' accounts of their parents' political outbursts do I realise how fortunate I am to have such ideologically sound forebears.

What the f**k is that?

How does that compare to a pie kick?

I'd celebrate if Arfield scored. And I've got a season ticket at Hampden. f**k off Strachan

You'll do yourself a damage holding it in for that long.

Whilst I think it's maybe a bit premature to be talking about the new contract, I understand why the board want to keep him. Look around at the other options, he's won me over since Bonnyrigg and - even if we go down this season - I'll be absolutely fine with us keeping him on, so long as the standard of performances remains as good as it has been over the past few weeks. In other news, remember this? Oh Dylan.

This is the sort of thorough, reasoned and intelligent attack line responsible for the stunning electoral successes of Unionist parties in Scotland since the turn of the decade.

Can't even bite back on that one, bang on.

Sorry, I had to head to the chipper. I will give this to @Shandon Par its not my tongue, its the dugs. Not an everyday item, however in more households than a fucking ecofan! Thanks for playing!

Can you zoom out a bit? It's hard to see what it is.

Is there not a level of hypocrisy, though, to use poverty and the struggle of people with disabilities and health problems as the backbone of an argument against independence and then stand side by side with the Tories? It seems to me that Labour are standing against the SNP rather than against Independence. It's almost forgivable that individuals can't separate the two but for a political party it's not. Labour hate the SNP. Absolutely and it's not hard to see why. They let that colour everything they do and say though, and all it's doing it's driving the nail deeper and deeper into their coffin. When watching Kezia Dugdale and Anas Sarwar speaking, the pure loathing for the SNP, and Sturgeon is palpable. Why would anyone warm to that?

Listening to both the last two nights has been refreshing. On the one hand you have a guy who's accent could cut glass and speaks about drugs, yet speaks about the game and the kids he teaches with pride, passion, clarity and hope. You also have the Mogadon Mourinho, boring you half to death about playing really well between the 12 yard boxes. One of them works for the SFA, it should be of no surprise to any of us that its the wrong one.

Here's at wee stat for you guys tonight, was looking through our fixtures and incredibly in our last 12 games we've only lost 3 times....all 3 defeats have been from East Fife Well done guys on a fantastic season, hope you make the playoffs but I hope you fail to get promoted, for obvious reasons, I don't think I could take another beating from you lot

Quite right. I, for one, found it utterly reckless to hold a Brexit referendum when one Brexiteer literally murdered a sitting MP. We should never have caved in to their demands. Sad.

Unfortunately she is great with the bairns!

Dads Canadian, there is Scottish players with lesser links to Scotland and playing Hibs w**k Strachan's loss

Trident keeping us all safe though

How many European trophies did Goram win? Leighton got 2 iirc

Daniella Westbrooke's coffee table?

Fucking hell! Do you live in the 1400's?

Is it specifically a fan?

Well no. And that's a good debate to be had as to whether this one is or not. If, for example, you say something is unfair and base the argument on 'we're a nation, you're a region', then I'm unlikely to go for it as I'm not a nationalist. The kind of argument Mhairi Black seems to be putting forward on twitter comparing Scotland to London. I'd be more persuaded if the argument was that the union was failing to take into account the needs of a constituent part. Off the top of my head, the union was only delivering policies suited to urban areas and not taking into account rural areas. Unfairness in a 'tyranny of the majority' type way. Then you can argue as to whether these needs can been catered for by devolving power over certain things to constituent parts, or full on independence from the union is needed. I don't go for unfairness based on nationality and I think that the referendums we have seen have exaggerated difference. My view is unions are valuable and although different constituent parts of a union have different needs, that doesn't necessarily mean the whole idea of the union is bad. I don't have an ideal in my head as to what the perfect shape of a union, whether that be the UK or Europe should be, but I favour further integration and growing unions, generally. But yes, if the union, whatever union, is disadvantaging a constituent part, then that needs to be addressed and that's the debate that can be had about how to best address it.

He's teetering on the precipice between "haha lads, fucking tough one this, eh?" and a group of pissed off strangers from the internet putting burning bags of shite through his letterbox.

There is no way I would stay at one of their hotels. Did he not see some of the stuff they did in Syria ?

I'm the one and only demonominanator.

Got a new car that I'm extremely chuffed with, ok it's 4 years old, but it's a beauty.

I seems like a shame to lose touch though, I'm constantly popping into their thread for a friendly 'chit-chat' I think they appreciate it, and I would encourage others to do the same. Thank you.

Surprised throbber hasn't guessed if it's an industrial sized gas oven.

You have no mandate. Back in your box all of you.

You're getting warmer.

Listening to that half-wit Pressley was even more depressing than usual last night. I had completely forgotten that he was part of Strachan's Scotland set-up. With Strachan, McGhee, Pressley, MacKay and Regan all holding the main positions within the SFA, what hope is there?

I agree — he seems a bit simple. Seems it's not just him, either; http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-39278092 Thank you.

If there are any Edinburgh based NFL fans on here you might be interested in this: http://www.nfluk.com/news/specialfeatures/article-1/NFL-UK-Live-tickets-on-sale-now/d6ca5e1f-c57c-42a7-a8e8-585cc20d71f4

The Byrds : Turn Turn Turn (To Everything There Is A Season)

One of the funniest shows ever! Stoneybridge!

It's definitely amazing what you can buy for a pound these days. I heard of one guy...

24 if Dunfermline are still there!!!

It might just be me, but carrying out their manifesto promises sounds like literally the exact job they were elected to do.

AFC Career Apps & Goals (Lge, Cup, Total) Steven Doris 143(14) 63, 23(1) 3, 166(15) 66 Eddie Ferns 5(3) 1, 0 0, 5(3) 1 Cammy Gill 0 0, 0 0, 0 0 David Gold 37(12) 1, 8(3) 1, 45(15) 2 Ricky Gomes 21(1) 0, 3 0, 24(1) 0. 10 clean sheets Colin Hamilton 97 4, 14 3, 111 7 Kane Hester 4(29) 4, 1(5) 1, 5(34) 5 Bryan Hodge 8 0, 0 0, 8 0 Omar Kader 16(12) 5, 7 1, 23(12) 6 Bobby Linn 134 35, 23(2) 4, 157(2) 39 Ricky Little 91(4) 5, 18(1) 1, 109(5) 6 Gavin Malin 3(10) 2, 0(2) 0, 3(12) 2 Donald McCallum 0(2) 0, 0 0, 0(2) 0 Ryan McCord 23(1) 7, 6(1) 0, 29(2) 7 Bryan Prunty 10(11) 1, 5(1) 0, 15(12) 1 Jimmy Scott 17(4) 8, 6 1, 23(4) 9 Josh Skelly 23(13) 7, 0(2) 0, 23(15) 7 Matthew Smyth 1(4) 1, 0 0, 1(4) 1 Jassem Sukar 21 0, 2 0, 23 0 Josh Thomson 0 0, 2(2) 0, 2(2) 0 Mark Whatley 97(1) 5, 19(1) 1, 116(2) 6 Up to & including 2-0 away win v Berwick Rangers 18/3/17

Perhaps Kez will press the wrong button again like a fanny and try to blame the SNP.

She is the Jamie Langfield of Scottish politics.

Would recommend everyone listen to the podcast. The guy should be extremely proud of himself not just with the amount of work he is doing with kids but getting through his battles. A truly inspiring listen. In the same way that he spoke of receiving drug advice in the 80s at school from those who knew nothing about drugs, there are far too many "experts" out there with opinions on why we have no great footballers anymore. It's people like him and others who should be at the forefront of the debate. Didn't realise they also do a lot of work helping kids and families out there that isn't just related to football. All for free. Well done Andy McLaren. Huge pat on the back.

If I were you I would I'd spend more time perfecting cooking skills than providing critiques on away grounds.