Shotgun

She's got better but we have a friend who used to feel the need to document every single interaction she had with anyone so she could post about it on social media. I took to doing the pretend finger up the nose bit as well because it was the only way to prevent her posting my picture. She would get mad at me but could never see my point that not everyone 'wants' the whole world to know where they are and what they're doing at all times. I say she's got better but at the moment, I happen to know she and her husband are on holiday in Holland (Utrecht today, according to Facebook) and their dog is with a pet sitter. They have some quite nice stuff if anyone's interested in a spot of breaking and entering. PM me for details.

A popular t-shirt among the roaster demographic here at the moment has a graphic of the 'Murkan fleg and the caption "If this flag offends you, I'll help you pack." Now, I can guaranchuffingtee that I hang around with a lot more liberals than any of those deep thinkers but I haven't met a single person who is "offended" by the fleg. Not one. Offended by politicians hiding behind it as they commit atrocities, yes. But that's a different conversation. Anyway, I saw one of these babies earlier this week. They really do seem to struggle with the difference between "offend" and "disagree", don't they?

What was this all about?

Why would anyone want to take their children to a pub? Why would anyone want to spend time in a pub with children? If the family is out for a meal, then Fairy Nuff (assuming the children are well behaved*) but if it's just drinking...I don't get it. * This also applies to dogs, with the meal/drinking bit reversed.

“Remember and tell your Uncle to call me.”

5pm here in Colorado and I’m already comfortably buzzed. Mrs Shotgun has just asked if I remember agreeing to go and look for a new fridge tomorrow. 30+ years of marriage and it’s like she doesn’t know me at all. Bless her.

Sorry to hear that. Too much of the bear tranquiliser, I assume?

Let's spare a thought for our friends in Greenock at this difficult time.

Here in the Yooessuvvay, many of the same people who have no problem dressing in Kelly Green, exaggerating their tenuous ancestral links to the Emerald Isle and drinking shitey beer dyed green every year, also get livid at the very idea of anyone celebrating Cinco de Mayo (Mexico's victory over the Second French Empire at the Battle of Puebla in 1862). "That's not our culture!" It takes a special breed of miseryguts to get angry at people enjoying themselves.

Sitting by a warm fire on a cold day, with a dug snoozing at your feet.

I think you mean Cheltenham.

No Morton fans on the thread tonight? Odd.

You can guarantee the people most in favour of this will be the ones who are confident THEY won’t be going.

Wills probably gave Kate a dose. That or an unwanted pregnancy due to the risk of the offspring looking like her bodyguard.

How many active users are there on P&B these days? We could all chip in a few quid and make it our official clubhouse. Handy for all central belt games, especially those in Glasgow and the surrounding environs. Given the number of alcoholics on the site, we'll never be short of customers and there are enough teetotalers here to set up a Designated Driver rota. Get in a decent pie vendor, negotiate a deal with Tennents and install a kettle for the Bovril and we'll be raking it in. @Shandon Par could decorate the place, @throbber to do a tasteful mural and give @RH33 a stool near the door to entice the passing trade. I think we could be onto something here.