Rab B Nesbit Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 We reckon at Whitehill we are going through 1.5 bog rolls per game. How does this compare to elsewhere? Guess it's probably a lot higher at the likes of Spartans with such a big squad and therefore more erse holes? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jacksgranda Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 I think that should be "useage" rather than "consumption". If they are being consumed, change your pie supplier. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 I think that should be "useage" rather than "consumption". If they are being consumed, change your pie supplier. I worked with a girl who ate toilet roll. I might have mentioned it before. She was quite open about it ie losing weight to get married. Apparently it expands in your stomach, making you feel full. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Venti Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 I worked with a girl who ate toilet roll. I might have mentioned it before. She was quite open about it ie losing weight to get married. Apparently it expands in your stomach, making you feel full. Plain? Or shite flavoured? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 Plain? Or shite flavoured? I did ask her if she got the expensive quilted stuff for special occasions and if she had a self cleaning arse. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HibeeJibee Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 RabBNesbit may have unwittingly stumbled upon a solution to the dearth of published attendance figures. "An impressive crowd at Netherdale saw 3.7 rolls were expended, almost an entire roll up on the season's previous high-point. "Meanwhile at Islecroft only a disappointing 43 sheets were used, and this included Andrex double-layered". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bullywee Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 An interesting proposal although you'd have to introduce a toilet roll standard so measurements would be accurate. There's also the danger of The Rangers lacing their pies and bovrils with laxatives in order to manipulate the figures. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jacksgranda Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 An interesting proposal although you'd have to introduce a toilet roll standard so measurements would be accurate. There's also the danger of The Rangers lacing their pies and bovrils with laxatives in order to manipulate the figures. And Celtic lacing theirs with antidiarrhoeal agents. Could end in a sticky situation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rab B Nesbit Posted December 30, 2014 Author Share Posted December 30, 2014 I think that should be "useage" rather than "consumption". If they are being consumed, change your pie supplier. I meant in economic terms but then again I'm nae English teacher. With 6 home games coming up in nearly as many weeks we'll be lucky if a 9 pack will see us through. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bomber behind the goals Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 Get the quilted variety softer on the bum if we run out cam use some old unsold programmes !! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rab B Nesbit Posted December 30, 2014 Author Share Posted December 30, 2014 RabBNesbit may have unwittingly stumbled upon a solution to the dearth of published attendance figures. "An impressive crowd at Netherdale saw 3.7 rolls were expended, almost an entire roll up on the season's previous high-point. "Meanwhile at Islecroft only a disappointing 43 sheets were used, and this included Andrex double-layered". I was really only thinking about the bog roll used in the changing rooms Hibee but this could be huge. We'd need to work out a formula. I could be following in the footsteps of a Jean-Marc Bosman. The Nesbit Formula. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Voice of (t)reason Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 I was really only thinking about the bog roll used in the changing rooms Hibee but this could be huge. We'd need to work out a formula. I could be following in the footsteps of a Jean-Marc Bosman. The Nesbit Formula. Now that is pure shite by the way. Is it available from Tesco at the far end of Bonnyrigg? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Simplistic Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 I've been to the Whitehill bogs previously and due to the poor quality and often lack of availability I bring my own, therefore this isn't going to work as an accurate counter. Also, the Whitehill Pie carries a 3 to 4 hour passer through rating meaning I often don't suffer the consequences until I'm home. During my precious trip to BSC the lights were out too meaning that any paper related activities were too risky to continue. Best seat in the house is at EK for me. Amble sized and cleaned regularly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tamthebam Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 Sir Peter says "whit's this... why are we spending good money on bog paper when the Midlothian Advertiser is much cheaper. Cut it up into squares and hing it on a nail..." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grim O'Grady Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 Can I request you get izal in at Fergie Park, you get a much better trajectory when lobbing it from the shallow end. Grimbo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MacGafraidh Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 you have to also account for single and double ply rolls, some clubs may treat their fans better! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sir Peter Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 Whit's this... why are we spending good money on bog paper when the Midlothian Advertiser is much cheaper. Cut it up into squares and hing it on a nail... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grim O'Grady Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 f**k me Tam was right Grimbo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rab B Nesbit Posted December 30, 2014 Author Share Posted December 30, 2014 Ask a simple question and all you wind up merchants start taking the p. I'm looking for numbers of rolls - middle of the road to cheap - teams get through in a game. Spartans gold trim Andrex I'm no sure that'll be much use for oor statistics. And the Advertiser is 85p these days! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Mantis Posted December 30, 2014 Share Posted December 30, 2014 This thread is top quality Rab. Just like the reusable paper at AP. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.