[mungo]

1. People trying to get on the bus/train while I am trying to get off it. Let me off first then you can get on, theres no need for us to grind against each other while i try to get off and you try to get on.

2. People slurping/chomping/sooking food in public. There was a guy on the bus yesterday eating an orange , and the horrible noises - the constant "slurp slurp, sook sook, chomp chomp" was revolting.

3. Acronmyms at work. My job has about a 100 of them , and I have no idea what any of them stand for. Whenever they are mentioned in meetings by the boss I just give a nod and plenty of "yes yes I see" etc etc . The reality is I have no idea what she is talking about.

4.Ladettes. Fat ugly girls trying to dress sexy. I dont want to see your big flabby belly hanging over your jeans, Buy a T-shirt that fits you. I also dont want to see you ugly puss covered in orange paint , or to hear you talk about getting pissed and pumped.

5.A begger . Every day for the last six months I have seen the same guy on my way home from work, and he always asks me for change. I never have any and ive never given him any. But every day he persists in asking me about 10 times in a row. I dont carry any money on me,only my bus card , and ive told him this , but he keeps asking me .

This post has been edited by mungo: 30 December 2011 - 01:16

[dan_ict]

1. When inconsiderate wee fannies play their music out loud on the bus/train/anywhere.
2. People speaking in text.
3. (kind of similar to no.2) When people misuse the apostrophe. I know, slightly petty but it really gets on my tits for some reason.
4. When people use the phrase "pre-drinks". Again, I really don't know why...
5. Chinos. Horrible, horrible trousers that look like mustard and shite. I'd rather wear McKee's pish stained jeans...

[Enigma]

People who call baked potatoes jacket potatoes.

I can't think of another 4 and I know it can't be matched.

[10 CC ICT]

• top 5 lists

[Tryfield]

1- Noisy eaters (joost fuckin GGRRRR)
2- Bad manners. Please + thanks...don't cost a penny.
3- Ticketless p***ks on trains, holding everyone else up.
4- Folk that let their dugs shite anywhere withoot picking it up. (That's a major hate BTW)
5- Cold beer served in a wet glass. Useless.

[uberman]

1 Women in checkout queues - I'm sick of watching them stand about while their shopping goes through the register, start packing it right away! Then you have to wait while they fanny about in their purse getting the money or cards out, have it ready at the start ya middens

2 People walking really slowly in busy streets

That's all for now, I'm going shopping soon so no doubt I'll be adding to this list

[McKee]

c***s that take the huff when it's their turn to go in goal. You'll find those that are goaloes by trade to be the worst for this.

[nessies long lost ghost]

1, Noisy eating is definitely my number one. The noise makes me physically sick.

2. People pretending to be black

3. Rap music

I can't think of another two.

[DJP]

1. c***s who moan about Flights when at airport. Earlier this year was in Malta and Holland. Everybody knows the crack with RyanAir and how the seats are a free for all. Bloke next to me in the queue saying how a big a disgrace it was and how he will never fly RyanAir again, ffs you must have known about the seating policy before you booked up. Other flight from Amsterdam, our BMI Baby flight delayed by all of 30mins (due to strikes in France where plane was coming from). Guy next to me saying what a disgrace and how he is only going to use KLM from now on. For fucks sake, it was only 30 minutes and it was hardly BMI's fault.

2. Still at airports when flying on a non budget airline, so everyone has a allocated seat. Should be no hurry. But when in the departure room rate to board, people all trying to queue jump and push to the front? Why do you do this??? Queue jumpers in any walk of life annoy the hell out of me.

3. If someone at the Bar before me and I get served first, I will say this bloke/lady before me and let them get served. Hate it when you are the person waiting and people don't point out X was waiting before them.

4. People unable to drive. A rant from nimrods not being able to work out how indicators work to idiots who drive 40mph in a 60mph zone, then when you overtake them, they proceed to flash you and stick full beam on. Finally when raining and cars with no fucking lights on. My friends do tend to call me Mr Angry when driving and do admit to losing it, but if people could do the basics then I would be a lot calmer.

5. Basic manners. How I love spending £100 at Sainsbury's for the slack jawed yokel on the checkout to not even say Hello or Thank you ffs, half the time not even reading the amount the shop comes to. Whilst on supermarkets, the lazy gits who just leave trolly in middle of carpark.

This post has been edited by DJP: 30 December 2011 - 18:29

[RobRoyGuy]

1.When you ask someone what there up to and they reply back ' just chilling out ' does my head in for some reason

2. noisey wee fuckers on the bus who see someone they know outside and start banging on the window to get there attention.

3.woman in front of you in a que , who have all day to look out there money but don't till there getting served , then when they finally are done they start talking to the shop assistant about something totally pointless , unaware that there is a big que behind them and some of those people may be in a rush !

4.Youngsters hanging about near a shop waiting for someone to go in and get them fags or booze , some wee guy the other day stopped me and even though i told him no 5 times he decided to follow me all the way down the road , would not take no for an answer. when asking him what age he was , he said 13 , i said no way , he said honestly big man i am 13

5.homeless people sitting down next to a bank machine , asking for spare change

[Patrick Bateman]

People who use the word 'ace'. Stop it. Stop it now.

People with no manners.

People who cough and sneeze in your vicinity without covering their noses/mouths.

People who try and talk to you when they can clearly see you are reading a book.

People that go to the self service checkouts in supermarkets when they don't know how to use them properly.


I fucking detest people.

[roverthemoon]

Noisy eating easily far and away the worst.

c***s talking in the cinema and at gigs. If you want to chat to your pal go to a venue where others are there to also chat. Not there to listen to a band or watch a film.

b*****ds in banks and supermarkets trying to sell you shit at the till/counter. No I'm not interested in moving my mortgage or your 5 for a pound tasteless doughnuts. I'm in to do what I wanted to do.

Queue jumpers.

People who tail gait and who basically drive like dicks.

[qosrush]

Drivers who dont indicate are just ignorant f**kers.
People at cash machines(Especially women) who take an eternity , The f**king interest rates have changed by the time i get to the front of the queue.
Those arrogant b*stards that hog the middle on motorways ,Its incompetant driving.
Finally , Farmers ,Get your f**king tractors off the road. I dont mind when they pull over when its convenient its when they drive past lay-bys with about thirty cars sitting behind them.

[Tennent's Lager#1]

RobRoyGuy, on 30 December 2011 - 18:38, said:

4.Youngsters hanging about near a shop waiting for someone to go in and get them fags or booze , some wee guy the other day stopped me and even though i told him no 5 times he decided to follow me all the way down the road , would not take no for an answer. when asking him what age he was , he said 13 , i said no way , he said honestly big man i am 13

Brilliant, he must think it's 13 and over to ask someone to jump in for you. The most annoying fannies are the one's that wait till you've been in the shop already then ask, would never get it, but fucking hell, what amateurs.

[Erin Go Bragh]

I don't understand how people can sit with others and make a disgusting noise eating, munching away with their mouths open. Have they no self awareness whatsoever? That aside, I'll say:

1) People who say literally when they shouldn't. "I'm literally on fire right now", if only you were.

2) When people wait until they're getting on the bus to sort out their change. You were at the stop for 20 minutes, but when people are waiting for you that's when you decide to shuffle through the pennies. Bellend.

3) People shortening words that shouldn't be shortened, for example "gorge" or "totes". OMG, you're like totes a massive c**t.

4) People who check their smartphones every two minutes in the pub. "Did you see Tits McGee's status?". No, I'm in the pub you cretin.

5) Grown-up people who still don't know how to say words that end with ly, for example "Lewis Stevenson played terrible today". Unless you learned English from Soccer Saturday, it's inexcusable.

Edit: These things and intolerance of course.

This post has been edited by Erin Go Bragh: 02 January 2012 - 20:30

[superwell87]

1) Noisy eaters
2) People who write/ talk in text speak
3) Queue jumpers
4) Bad manners
5) People who have no regard for others than themself(s)

[Lambie's Pigeon Feed]

1. Hotel toilet paper, from a small 2 star B&B to a 5 star Hilton you always get the kind of crappy toilet paper you used to get in school, I'm not asking for satin shit tickets but the own brand 'luxury' stuff I buy for buttons is infinitely better than their sandpaper.

2. People talking in movie quotes and/or accents, just cause I found it funny once doesn't mean you do it every time you see me.

3. Showers that aren't powerful, I was back at my maws for Xmas and she has had the bathroom re-done, woeful shower. And a mate I have literally has a dribble coming out his shower, total nightmare when you stay over at his.

4. Crap hosts, you've got a few mates that have driven a few hours to spend the weekend with you at least have some basic rations in the house, 3 of us went to stay with a mate over New Year (for 3 nights) and he had purchased one packet of bacon (6 rashers), one loaf of bread, 3 oven pizzas, 1 bag of wedges and a 6 pack of crisps. Granted we'd be out a lot of the time but mon tae f**k that's gonna do 1 night and 1 breakfast...oh and as it's your house you put the pizzas in the oven that nobody knows how to work cause it's from the 1950's rather than declaring, "naw I bought them one of you do it". Oh and he had 1 box of beer in his house, we turned up with a few crates and bottles of wine/whisky which saved the day.

5. People who think a hobby makes them intelligent and/or interesting, that's right I'm going to the football, you go to some wanky special screening of some pish foreign film in an arthouse cinema if you like but don't pretend this gives you some sort of superiority as a result.

[SuperCaleyGoBallistic]

Erin Go Bragh, on 02 January 2012 - 20:26, said:

3) People shortening words that shouldn't be shortened, for example "gorge" or "totes". OMG, you're like totes a massive c**t.

Along these lines, I have noticed alot of girls shortening the word jealous to "jel".

A special place in hell should be reserved for dem bitches, I tells ye.

[chuckles]

nessies long lost ghost, on 30 December 2011 - 17:39, said:

1, Noisy eating is definitely my number one. The noise makes me physically sick.

2. People pretending to be black

3. Rap music

I can't think of another two.

2. People pretending to be black

Yep. Although, to be fair, it seemed to work for Al Jolson.

[HEY_SIDNEY]

1. Going for a shit and forgetting to put the loo roll down first so splashback doesnt occur (not helping with this ulcerative colitis - arse is soaking ha)

2. Going to restaurants/pubs etc and the toilet paper is in those wee squares, just give me a loo roll, i will determine the length of paper i wipe my arse with thanks.

3. When you ask someone their age and they retort - 24 on my next birthday. OK so that makes you 23, which was the question i asked swed!!

4. People who put FML at end of anything the write whether its fb, text or bbm. you do not hate your life that much.

5. Jeckyl & Hyde people. 1 minute there all nice and talkative, 2 days later they cant string a sentence in your direction. Arse pieces.

[Gogs Grog]

1. This is the biggie for me. The one that really pisses me off is people who carry more than 1 item of hand luggage onto a flight when it clearly states only 1 to be taken. Then when you get to your seat there is no room for your small 'man bag' because some bearded wonder has brought half his house with him and shoved it into the luggage bins. In fact he's got more hand luggage than I put in the hold.

2. The reclining seats on planes that are put back so your dinner is in your lap, usually done withing 5 seconds of the planes wheels leaving the tarmac. Can't they wait until the meals over and people are all trying to sleep. Selfish p***ks.

3. The lack of indicators on cars up here in Montrose. And in addition to that the absolute lack of knowledge on how round-abouts work.

4. People who can't park more than 50 yards away from supermarkets front doors. So they park in the disabled/Mother & Child or just park on the double yellow right outside the door. Tend to find that the people doing this could do with the extra couple of hundred yards walking for their health.

5. The one mentioned previously gets on my tits regarding waiting at a bar to be served and people jumping in ahead of you. But if its the other way round, you point out that sic-and-sic was there before you and should get served first.

I'm finding I'm turning into my dad the older I get and more and more crabbit about things that never used to bother me.

This post has been edited by Gogs Grog: 03 January 2012 - 07:36

[Brian Reid = God]

1. The shortening on words such as "jealous" to "jel" - Shortening a two syllable word is just moronic and people that do it should get a few teeth chisled out every time.
2. Morons at college/uni who never do coursework or homework, instead borrowing other peoples to copy answers. If you have the privilege to be allowed to enter higher education you should at least put the effort in. Drown the fuckers!
3. People talking too loudly in public places or on public transport.
4. Scaging b*****ds.
5. Ladettes.

This post has been edited by Brian Reid = God: 03 January 2012 - 15:39

[dan_ict]

6. People who open doors and don't close them afterwards. It honestly makes me want to burn someone.

[lanky_ffc]

Surprised noones mentioned being stuck next to a screaming wean on a plane/train/bus. I can generally put up with this if the parent is making an effort to calm the child down. But the amount of times I've seen them let their kids run wild or just aren't strict enough with them is unreal.

[forehead7]

SaltyTON, on 04 January 2012 - 00:25, said:

2) Self service checkouts, who the hell thought these would be helpful? "Please put the item in the bagging area" - yes I will, if you give me more than half a bloody second to open the carrier bag, it's not a race!

Patrick Bateman, on 30 December 2011 - 19:03, said:

People that go to the self service checkouts in supermarkets when they don't know how to use them properly.

...yeah.


I'm gonna be really general with mine because I get pissed off easily.

1. Hipsters, or hipster types. This includes skinny jeans(I hope you do become infertile so as not to pass on your stupid denim preferences on to future generations), shortening of words or the use of things like "lol" "soz" "fml" in real life. My mate says "soz lol" all the time and it does my tits in.

As a slightly related hate, rhyming slang does my head in as well. Again, another thing my dad does a lot(sensing a pattern here). Pineapple is the chapel, no my grandparents are not going to the pineapple. Pineapple is longer than chapel, you're putting more effort into being a c**t than just saying whatever it is!

2. Bad manners, sneezing without covering up is my biggest hate. My dad does it all the time. He holds his nose but doesn't close his mouth and ends up spiting all over the place, it's fucking horrible. Whenever anyone has a cold in the house, he's always like "don't be giving me that!", aye well you do a shit job of keeping your germs ya p***k"

3. Stupid questions. Again, primarily from my dad. Comes in the house, my mum's car isn't outside and asks if she's in or he says "oh, you're in" No, I'm not ya fucking clown. Or asks where she is in the house, why don't you look about you p***k? It's not a big house ffs! He then gets pissed off when I give him a stupid answer.

4. Hearing someone else's music when outside. I like to listen to music loudly, out of speakers or at gigs etc but to have that concentrated in your ears? I hope those people go deaf quickly. Playing it straight out your phone on buses, trains is just horrible.

5. Slow walkers. If you're an old person or don't walk fast then move to the side, some of us walk quickly and don't want to be stuck behind you!

This post has been edited by forehead7: 06 January 2012 - 04:31