[BigMartyn86]

1. Rufus hound. A fud.
2. Jack Whitehall. A posh middle class w****r who is as funny as a dose of the clap.
3. Andy parsons. His voice goes right through me.
4. Stephen k Amos. Just shit.
5. James corden. He's just a fat f**k who brown noses celebs to much. His world cup show was absolutely brutal

A special shoutout to all the female comedians as well. Never seen one yet who can make me laugh.

[keyser_soze]

1. Jimmy Carr
2. Jimmy Carr
3. Jimmy Carr
4. Jimmy Carr
5. Jimmy Carr

[Albino Rover]

1. Seann Walsh- as useless as the extra "n" in his name
2. Al Murray- mistakes "loud" for "funny"
3. Micky Flanagan- 10% of what he says is snigger-worthy, the rest mince.
4. Chris Addison, ditto. Has (limited) comedy acting ability but stand up goes tits up.
5. Sarah Millican, Shappi Khorsandi, Jo Brand... someone's got to stop the catering staff from wandering onstage.

[F_T_Y]

Alan Carr
Ed Bryne
Jo Brand
Jack Whitehall
Russel Howard

[jester]

1. Gina Yashere
2. Russell Brand
3. Tim Minchin
4. Lee Evans
5. Omid Djalili

[HEY_SIDNEY]

Albino Rover, on 25 December 2011 - 14:11, said:

1. Seann Walsh- as useless as the extra "n" in his name
2. Al Murray- mistakes "loud" for "funny"
3. Micky Flanagan- 10% of what he says is snigger-worthy, the rest mince.
4. Chris Addison, ditto. Has (limited) comedy acting ability but stand up goes tits up.
5. Sarah Millican, Shappi Khorsandi, Jo Brand... someone's got to stop the catering staff from wandering onstage.

All excellent shouts except Micky Flanagan. The guys simply hilarious. The way he tells a story is unreal.He keeps you gripped because he moves about the stage unlike the clowns who just stand in one spot. (and before someone says it - i know thats why they move about to keep you focused)

However the rest of them i agree 100%....especially Seann Walsh the nasaly c*nt!!

[WaffenThinMint]

My God, what a choice!

1. Russell Brand - talentless soapdodging fop. Loved it when he tried slagging off Bob Geldof as "Brad Gandalf"on live TV, got simply "c**t!" in reply from Geldof, and was so nearly in tears about it he went on and on about the incident in interviews for years after.

2. Alex Zane - like Brand a right wee scrote that thinks cruelty = humour but cries like a girl if anyone gives him a taste of his own.

3. Michael McIntyre. He may look like Mike Myers but the resemblence ends there. How the hell did he ever become so popular?

4. Harry Hill. Adrian Edmondson's, Eddy Hitler from "Bottom" - remedial class version.

5. Alan Carr. Like Michael McIntyre another of those everyone wonders (a) where the f**k did he come from? (b) why the f**k do TV producers think he's funny? Got pwned by his local MP Anne Widdecombe, and when that happens it really is time to give up pretending you're a comedian.

6. Jo Brand . Was to all accounts a nasty piece of work when she was a psychiatric nurse and clearly never changed. Someone that doesn't realise that Viz's Millie Tant was parodying her before she'd even arrived onstage.

7. Graham Norton. Another like Alan Carr that thinks doing the old "screaming homosexual" comedy routine means screaming a lot makes you funny.

8. Vic Reeves. Talentless f**ker who only got anywhere because teen girls wanted to get serviced by him, and got found out big time by "Randell & Hopkirk" that it was his sidekick Bob Mortimer that was the one with the real talent and delivery, thus never heard from since - thank f**k!

9. Lee Evans. Sweaty chimpanzee that's about as funny as getting a positive cancer test result.

10. Olivia Lee. Crap predictable "yaa-boo-sucks-to-be-you" undergraduates fap favourite. When the novelty wore off long after her "pranks" did, started playing the Jew card like the equally unfunny Sarah Silverman to try and stay afloat - yeah, like Jews are such a rarity amongst the comedian fraternity! Groucho Marx, Lenny Bruce or Mel Brooks she ain't.

[aidan-bufc]

1. Stephen K Amos: Never find anything about this man amusing!
2. Graham Norton: Seems to have been around for ages, and have no idea why...
3. Al Murray: Tries his best to be a typical Brit, and a guy everyone would love to go to the pub with and he just fails miserably.
4. Shappi Khorsanda: Repeats herself far too much about being Iranian and when she actually changes subject, she moves on to something even more boring.
5: Jo Brand: Aye, we all know your fat, get over it!

[L. Brilliant]

Lee Evans - pouring-faced irritant whose eyes scream 'I am going to get caught one day for doing really really wrong things' with no jokes


Frankie Boyle - Mock the Weak ( + watered down, point-missing Sadowitz rip-off)


Lenny Henry - all too easy a target, but when was he funny?


Jim Davidson


Billy Connolly - depressing

[SaltyTON]

Thought I would buy whatever stand-up DVDs I could find for a couple of quid, even if I thought the person would be shit - just to see who really does suck!

The worst I have found so far was Ricky Tomlinson. Jesus H Christ, that man made most of the people on this list seem hilarious!

Oh, and F_T_Y, Ed Byrne is hilarious. Saw him at the Pavilion last month and he was brilliant.

[Albino Rover]

L. Brilliant, on 17 January 2012 - 22:58, said:

Billy Connolly - depressing

[chicmac]

Michael McIntyre
Billy Connelly
Stewart Lee
Al Murray
Fred MacCauley

[Bert Raccoon]

1.) Michael McIntyre
2.) Lee Evans
3.) Gina Yashere
4.) Omid Djalli
5.) Andy Parsons

I fucking hate comedians who either feel the need to run about like a dick and I especially hate comedians who think that being foreign and having an accent instantly makes them funny.

[BigMartyn86]

Tonight live at the apollo is possibly the worst line up ever.

[TheLip69]

Alan Carr
Lenny Henry
Russell Howard
Russell Brand
Noel Fielding


Alan Carr is just the latest in a long line of stereotypical gay comedians, mining the same seam and delivering the same old dross as all the others that preceded him.

Lenny Henry, in answer to a previous question, was never funny. He was different, he was a black 15 year old who impersonated Frank Spencer (badly) and the BBC patronised him for years, putting the poor little sod in the Black and White Minstrel Show was absolutely disgraceful.

Russell Howard, probably the weakest comedian I have ever seen. His delivery is awful and you see the punchline a mile away.

Russell Brand, the comedy of abuse and bullying, dont particularly find it funny, but if you are going to go down that line then you dont take the part of the bully.

Noel Fielding, totally and utterly awful. It's all been done before, mosty of it 50 years ago by Spike Milligan, the difference was he was funny, Fielding is not.

[Mrs M]

There's an advert running on Comedy Central at the moment, it's either for Michael McIntyre's Comedy Roadshow or Live At The Apollo. It doesn't matter really they're both the same. However, there is a woman in the trailer that describes herself as the sort of person who goes to cemeteries to feel better than someone else and laughing at dead folk gives her a sense of superiority, it would seem.

She is the worst comedian to have ever walked the earth. Women aren't funny as it is and this bint in the ads has the worst delivery I've ever seen. She's not even convincing herself. Why the hell is she on the damn telly?

This post has been edited by Mrs M: 23 January 2012 - 23:44

[fraser_smfc]

TheLip69, on 23 January 2012 - 22:45, said:

Alan Carr is just the latest in a long line of stereotypical gay comedians, mining the same seam and delivering the same old dross as all the others that preceded him.

Is it bad that I read that as "mincing"?

Mrs M, on 23 January 2012 - 23:42, said:

She is the worst comedian to have ever walked the earth. Women aren't funny as it is and this bint in the ads has the worst delivery I've ever seen. She's not even convincing herself. Why the hell is she on the damn telly?

On the whole I agree with you, most of them are excruciatingly bad. But Shappi Korshandi is the only comedienne to make me laugh, I think she's superb. And rather lovely to boot.

My top 5 I love to hate:

1) Noel Fielding - I'm surprised this guy makes it into this genre tbh. You look like a twat, get off my television.

2) Lee Evans - Just watching him uses energy, which probably explains the lack of laughter. Either that or the crap material.

3) Gina Yashere - Joke 1: "I'm from Nigeria". Joke 2 - "I'm from Nigeria". Joke 3 - ".....my mum, is from Nigeria!" Just go away.

4) Rhod Gilbert - I like him so much more after seeing him on Have I Got News For You recently, he was amusing when he was relaxed and not basing his routine on shouting and ranting.

5) That Irish comedian with the blond curly hair who is shit. I don't know his name but he is woeful.

[Milevskiy]

Gina Yasherie.. we're aware you're black and from Nigeria. Tell a joke please.

Jack Whitehall - probably all working class people would agree with me when I say "die"

Sarah Millican - making jokes about you and sex is rather disturbing

Stephen K. Amos - why do all black comedians take the piss out themselves for being black?

The last spot is a toss up between Andy Parsons (who makes probably the most simple and obvious jokes in history), Rhod Gilbert when shouting and Al Murray.

[forameus]

Jimmy Carr
Noel Fielding
Frankie Boyle
Michael McIntyre
Michael McIntyre

Michael McIntyre - deserved to be in there twice for multiplying how bad he really is against how good the public seem to think he is. He's an isn't-it-funny-when-this-happens-to-you comic. He's very similar to Peter Kay, but with a "funny" voice. But where Kay is sharp and a good watch on interviews, contrasting with his poor (IMO) stand-up, McIntyre is none of those things.

Frankie Boyle - he went up in my estimations slightly when guest-captaining on Buzzcocks, standing in for Phil Jupitus. When sitting next to a bint from the Only Way is Essex, I fully expected him to make her cry, but he was more subdued, but still very funny. However, his standup is cringeworthy at times. He doesn't give a shit, and although that's kind of good, the results are some pretty foul jokes. I'm all for bad taste, but he seems to be just saying them for shock value, rather than any kind of humour. Shame.

Noel Fielding - Absolute tool. Putting words together in a sing-song voice and creating "zany" characters is not funny. Stop it.

Jimmy Carr - decent on panel shows, but stand-up is woeful.

[JamboMikey]

Frankie Boyle
Sarah Silverman
Noel Fielding
Jimmy Carr
James Corden

[xbl]

So, another mainly "hate anyone successful list" then!

fraser_smfc, on 24 January 2012 - 00:09, said:

On the whole I agree with you, most of them are excruciatingly bad. But Shappi Korshandi is the only comedienne to make me laugh, I think she's superb. And rather lovely to boot.

I agree, I always look out for her tv spots. That said, maybe she only makes me laugh because I find her hot? I dunno, but I quite like her delivery, style, and material.